Children these days...

[andyoxon]

Mini andyoxons... "Let's tickle Daddy", "Yeah", "No let's torture him..."

Anyway, I got off lightly in the end ...after a few choruses of "I know a song that will get on your nerves, get on your nerves, get on your nerves..."

 

[gbb]

Jeeez...my son used to jump on my back and shove his fingers in each side of my mouth...and PULLLLLLLLL till i looked like a wide mouthed frog

Christ it hurt like hell

Mind, that aint as bad as a few lines of Joe Pasquales torture song...

 

[yorkshiregoth]

Mine just go shopping

 

[Fab Foodie]

Mine just go shopping

Mine too...and one of them's a proto-goth, any colour you like as long as it's black

 

[TVC]

Not having children myself, and on the theme of torture, at what age do you think yours are finally going to leave home?

 

[Melvil]

Not a father, but I have certainly learnt from assorted young 'uns I've looked after that a cricket box is essential when playing 'rough and tumble'!

 

[andyoxon]

Mine just knee me in the knackers every time they climb on my lap.

I know how dangerous it can be to dose off in a chair, and have them come flying through the air into your lap, knees first...

 

[surfgurl]

I've just read this thread to my husband. He tells me there is a website which gives you a series of questions which works out how many five year olds you can take on in a fight. He claims it says he could take on 25 of them.
Having seen him with his two boys when they were younger I think this is a vast exaggeration...

 

[Keith Oates]

Not having children myself, and on the theme of torture, at what age do you think yours are finally going to leave home?

When the money runs out I suppose!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[Sh4rkyBloke]

...He tells me there is a website which gives you a series of questions which works out how many five year olds you can take on in a fight.

And the URL is????

 

[wafflycat]

Not having children myself, and on the theme of torture, at what age do you think yours are finally going to leave home?

Mine has semi-left home at age 18. He's at the local university and lives in hall of residence. It works well - he's far enough away that he's got independence, but close enough that we keep in touch regularly. He also comes home at holiday periods and we see him when we transport him to & from cycling events. We get along and I think he's quite civilised, so perhaps we're unusual!

Mind you, he is a keen cyclist so it's obvious he has been brought up correctly

 

[Paulus]

Mine are 18 and 20 respectively and show no signs of wanting to leave home. The younger, my daughter is on the final stages of her A levels and my son is in full time employment with the Herts police. Bring the medicine matron.

 

[abchandler]

I've just read this thread to my husband. He tells me there is a website which gives you a series of questions which works out how many five year olds you can take on in a fight. He claims it says he could take on 25 of them.
Having seen him with his two boys when they were younger I think this is a vast exaggeration...

Sod the ante natal classes, just get every expectant father to complete this!!

 

[radger]

And the URL is????

http://www.howmanyfiveyearoldscouldyoutakeinafight.com/

 

[Arch]

http://www.howmanyfiveyearoldscouldyoutakeinafight.com/

Won't give me a score. And why does it say "Live near York? Join our singles club" at the bottom? Is that some clever thing knowing where I am, or coincidence?