Crassest exhortations

Big Bren

New Member
Location
Yorkshire
An excerpt from an email I received at work recently:

"It is my understanding that you have recently engaged in a communication interchange with the Director of Operations"

My reply:

"No, I spoke to Dave."

Bren
 

Noodley

Guest
We have a new member of staff who sits across from me. He was identified as a "business graduate" early on (by me :biggrin:) and since this time we have been ever vigilant as to "management speak". He only took two weeks to realise he should give up. Perhaps that is a recommendation for business graduates?
 

Keith Oates

Janner
Location
Penarth, Wales
My boss seems to be like the one User76 mentioned as he's always doing something 'going forward'. He also only attends meetings that are 'at a very senior level' He only invites you out to lunch or dinner to 'spend some quality time with you'!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
 

Arch

Married to Night Train
Location
Salford, UK
Keith Oates said:
We went through a period when the Head Office was known as Base, thankfully that seems to have died!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Bah, we called our York office Global Headquarters. We had sales people who lived in St Albans and Manchester, and we always meant to get three wall clocks that we could label and set to local time in those three places - I think worked out that there would actually be about a minute difference...:biggrin:
 

got-to-get-fit

New Member
Location
Yarm, Cleveland
let me run this one by you...

this is not a problem, its an opportunity for improvement...

this is a no blame culture...

try to get your home life balance correct....

lets see if this will fly in the ivory tower....

fail to plan? plan to fail!

these are all still commonly used in our firm, makes me feel like im living in a bad 80's movie sometimes.......wall street anyone?
 

Baroudeur

New Member
Ok these are all from one meeting. I sat at the back scribbling them down:

We want to see the levers going on
Park that idea
Suck it and see
Set up action codes
Confirm the clarity of the context of the answer
We're playing the game
We're ahead of the game
Phased in approach
Back to the ranch
Cohort/slice (used interchangeably and liberally)
All get off the oche!
This is the new world

Welcome to the world of NHS middle management.
 
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