Cycling special powers

[Sandra6]

The ability to get up hills with that effortless look every cyclist who passes me seems to have already.

 

[LosingFocus]

10 more hours in the day to allow me to get out and ride.

 

[Cyclopathic]

My cycling special power would be the same as the special power I'd choose for myself in everyday life. The ability to make someone instantly and with great force evacuate their bowels with just a thought. I would pick my moment very carefully so as not to endanger anybody but I would use it mercilessly on close passes, pinch point bullies, drivers who rev up at ped crossings to agitate the peds and any driver who got out of their car to remonstrate with me.
In some ways I am a very petty and vindictive sort of a person. I'm just sorry it would just be for a day.

 

[caimg]

My cycling special power would be the same as the special power I'd choose for myself in everyday life. The ability to make someone instantly and with great force evacuate their bowels with just a thought. I would pick my moment very carefully so as not to endanger anybody but I would use it mercilessly on close passes, pinch point bullies, drivers who rev up at ped crossings to agitate the peds and any driver who got out of their car to remonstrate with me.
In some ways I am a very petty and vindictive sort of a person. I'm just sorry it would just be for a day.

What if you suddenly thought 'wow I wonder if I could do it to mys - NOOOOOOOOOOOO'

 

[Rob3rt]

The ability to drink cast quantities of Guinness while maintaining the ability to embarrass WWWs while on my commuter.

WWW's?

 

[Cyclopathic]

What if you suddenly thought 'wow I wonder if I could do it to mys - NOOOOOOOOOOOO'

As a young man I drunkenly grilled myself some cod coated in batter for a bit of a drunken snack style of thing but being impatient and drunk (did I mention I was drunk) I turned the gas up to 11 which turned the batter a lovely golden brown in a matter of seconds. I simply ignored the still frozen parts of my fish in batter sandwich with tomato ketchup reasoning that people ate raw fish in the form of sushi and they were ok. It didn't taste the best but I was drunk and did not care. I continued not to care until a few hours later when I experienced the most god almighty deluge of crap in my pants as what I thought was a fart turned out to be something more substantial altogether.
I had in effect done exactly what my superpower would have alowed me to myself. With the simple thought "I fancy a fish sarny" I made me crap myself.

 

[caimg]

As a young man I drunkenly grilled myself some cod coated in batter for a bit of a drunken snack style of thing but being impatient and drunk (did I mention I was drunk) I turned the gas up to 11 which turned the batter a lovely golden brown in a matter of seconds. I simply ignored the still frozen parts of my fish in batter sandwich with tomato ketchup reasoning that people ate raw fish in the form of sushi and they were ok. It didn't taste the best but I was drunk and did not care. I continued not to care until a few hours later when I experienced the most god almighty deluge of crap in my pants as what I thought was a fart turned out to be something more substantial altogether.
I had in effect done exactly what my superpower would have alowed me to myself. With the simple thought "I fancy a fish sarny" I made me crap myself.

There's a moral in there somewhere but I'm not sure what it is...

 

[Cyclopathic]

There's a moral in there somewhere but I'm not sure what it is...

Oh I am. It's don't eat half cooked half frozen fish if you want to keep your underpants and your dignity.

 

[Big boy]

When the next lycra clad skinny person passes me, to be able to re overtake while smoking a rollup.
And then just go fast enough so they cant re overtake