Cycling tips, in rhyme. I'll start:-

[glasgowcyclist]

Cyclists who don't have reflectors
are used as a ploy to deflect us
from the truth of the matter
that when hit we splatter
and the court system fails to protect us.

GC

 

[RedRider]

I passed a cyclist by the road, her tyre seemed deflated
I offered her a sturdy pump, by Jove she was elated
She stroked and stroked as best she could but failed to reach the pressure
I took control with manly grip. Result? One lady's pleasure!
Her rack was full, a handsome load, with panniers a-bulging
She caught my gaze and asked me, "In what thoughts are you indulging?"
I could not lie, there was no point, my thoughts they were improper
I asked her if she'd do a trade for my new Raleigh Shopper
She rode off.
GC

By Jove missus, I read that in the voice of Ken Dodd.

 

[MossCommuter]

May I contribute in the form of Haiku?

Best left to poets
Poems are not like cycles
Best left to cyclists

 

[Accy cyclist]

If a car pulls out in front of you find out where the nobber lives and cover their door handles in dog poo!

 

[TheDoctor]

@ianrauk
Is a smashing bloke
Riding with Grace
Puts a smile on my face
@Plax has gone sober
Throughout October
I'd like to meet @Speicher
I'm sure that I'd like her
And those that I've missed
Are next on the list!