Daily insult thread.

Page may contain affiliate links. Please see terms for details.
JonoB said:
Does anybody get abuse from women drivers?

I came to a stop at a queue of traffic once and a woman in a rav4 pulled up inside me and quite aggressively said "You're going to get yourself killed riding like that."

I'd been riding in a straight line at a constant speed maintaining my position in the flow of traffic. She'd attempted an overtake and then an undertake on the approach to the lights - failed and then vented her spleen at me. I just looked at her as if she was an idiot. The lights changed and she then attempted to create a second lane across the junction so that she could undertake the two cars ahead of her, again she failed and ended up mounting the pavement in order to try and get one of her undertakes to stick.
 
Oh, and I've posted this one before but I'm still not clear on what the man was trying to convey. Warning/observation/insult?

Again similar situation to above, straight line, constant speed, failed overtake. His opener was: "You're all over the facking road."

and then "You're not on a facking Bosch."
 

D-Rider

New Member
Location
Edinburgh
JonoB said:
Does anybody get abuse from women drivers?

Yip - I ended up in a screaming match with a daft bint in a mini. She got bored in a traffic queue so swerved into the bus lane just as I was passing her. I managed to swerve round and suggested she should try checking her blind spot. She went totally radge, shouting it was my fault because I was "all over the f***ing road". I'm a "f***ing liability", apparently.

Anyway, I completely lost the plot - quite embarrassing to think about - we ended up just shouting at each other.
 

yenrod

Guest
> Daily insult thread.

And i thought this was the thread whereby I we all trade insults at each other and see who actually takes it personal ?

;)
 
JonoB said:
Does anybody get abuse from women drivers?

Had a couple of run-ins with women drivers – posted both of these on Cyclechat before.
Quick summary

1. Very close ( & illegal) overtake on Hammersmith
Bridge that pushed me into collision course with one of the columns – driver caught in jam at next set of lights - asked her why she did it – reply was that “because there isn’t a cycle lane on that bit of road you’re not allowed to cycle on it…” ???? punctuated with a few expletives.
Result – big dent in car

2. Banged on roof of 4x4 as it brushed past at pinch point – female driver took exception – pointed out I hadn’t damaged her car – just alerting her to how close she was – still very upset – “You touch my car again and I’ll have you” sort of comment – so I banged on the roof again and asked her if she meant like that – she got even more angry – so asked her why she was getting angry, was it because I just banged on her roof like this (and did it again) – she got even more angry – so I asked her why she was getting upset when I did this (banged on roof again) – very childish I know, but I was enjoying myself by know … Her: “I’ll call the police” – Me :”what for: because I did this to your car?” (another bang)… carried on in this vain until she was apoplectic and on the mobile to the cops… still makes me laugh thinking of her little ugly pug red face…
 
genesta said:
"self-gratification artist"????? That's OK then.

I thought I was being called a banker - that really hurt.

Man walks into a pub and shouts out “All lawyers are self-gratification artists!”
Bloke at the end of the bar says “Oi! I take exception to that.”
Man: “Why? Are you a lawyer?”
Bloke: “No! I’m a self-gratification artist”.
 
Location
Llandudno
Sig SilverPrinter said:
got called 'four eyed speccy c*nt' by boy racers

I am a four eyed speccy c*nt so don't really mind.

I had a young chavette say something like "get a proper bike, chicken legs" to which my best response was "shut it, turkey thighs".

Cue stream of intended abuse about my sexuality.
 
Last Thursday, I was gliding home past a Dominos pizza - just after the fire station at Brentford when a hatchbacky type of car just - pulled - out...right into my path. I was watching, as you do, and did the wave through the back window - cheery like - 3w Tesco + Cateye 510 blazing away + 2 x flashing leds..:laugh:
Anyway I assume the bloke inside the cage was having trouble moving a beer barrel because all I could hear as I drew alongside was a muffled selection of "Firkin..." "Can't" "Can't...firkin...:hyper:barsteward" - that sort of thing. And he seemed to be waving back at me As the road 'split' into bus lane and ordinary, I accelerated until I caught up and politely knocked on the window to see if I could help.
"You just pulled out in front of me back there kind sir" I mentioned...
He went nuts - like a dog straining on a leash - contained only by his seat belt. He tugged and tugged and he reached over... He slumped forward across the passenger seat then 'boinnnng!' He pushed the door open - straight onto my lovely bodywork creasing old Look pedals!. "Bam" the door closed again as the guy realised I was still upright and looking at him.:blush: Scary too - mental prep. took place. I decided not to help him with his barrel and rode off, leaving him to stew in the traffic. Always the best policy...but I did fear for the ignorant fat sod - looked as though there was an imminent boil up of his internal fluids!:biggrin:
 

RedBike

New Member
Location
Beside the road
I'm rather upset now. I can never make out what it is that gets shouted at me.

They always either drive past too quick or sound their horns at the same time.
 

Tynan

Veteran
Location
e4
yes, usually garbled

'get a life' once from three pudgy pasty too cool types with silly sideburns all wearing
the same clothes

I think it's the cyle glasses that really set people off sometime
 

downfader

extimus uero philosophus
Location
'ampsheeeer
cheadle hulme said:
I am a four eyed speccy c*nt so don't really mind.

I had a young chavette say something like "get a proper bike, chicken legs" to which my best response was "shut it, turkey thighs".

Cue stream of intended abuse about my sexuality.

I had someone call me a "four eyed c***!" last summer. Wasnt on the bike though, I was walking up a road around the corner from my home and was passing two teenage lads with their shirts off and drinking lager by the road. This lad leant right over and screamed it in my face. No provocation, no nothing. I was wearing shades too, not bonifide glasses.

I just stopped and stared at him silently for about 4 or 5 seconds before his mate rather nervously said something like "...matty, don't...." I'm quite a big bloke, 14 stone, wide shoulders and over 6 foot. I dont tend to get grief unless they can get away, and this guy immediately backed down, possibly thanks to his mate. :smile:
 
Top Bottom