Embarrassing moments whilst cycling

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johnnyb47

Guru
Location
Wales
Hi and Merry Christmas to you all.
Yesterday i had a somewhat an embarrassing ride out on the bike. It was a filthy hard going 45 mile slog on my Mtb and stopped around 30 miles in for a break. Unfortunately i had been eating way to many of those sugar free mints. From past experience they tend to give me a lot of wind and yesterday was no exception.
I stopped along this quiet lane were behind me was a very high retaining wall to the grounds of a Church. Whilst admiring the view for a few a few moments i let off one hell of a ripper in my trousocks to which even i was impressed with. There was nobody around (well that's what I thought) and all was good in the world.
Then all of a sudden this elderly chap spoke to me from above the wall telling me to show some respect there's a funeral taking place. Before i got chance to apologise he was gone. Feeling totally embarrassed and awful about it all i quickly disappeared into the sunset. As i set off around the lane skirting the church i could see all the cars parked outside the front and funeral was taking place just the other side of the wall were i had stopped.
On a serious side note i feel awful for being so disrespectful and would never of let it happen if i knew what was happening but i genuinely thought no one was around.
Oh well, there's nothing I can do about it now apart from putting it down to experience
 

Globalti

Legendary Member
Silly old fool must have been spying on you.

Or he was a ghost.
 

PeteXXX

Cake or ice cream? The choice is endless ...
Location
Hamtun
A couple of Christmas's ago, I volunteered to ride into town to pick up a final few pressies from Toys'r'us, as it would be car chaos on the last Saturday before Santa came.
I locked my bike to a metal bench outside the store, picked up the items and returned to my bike...
Sadly, the keys to my locks were not in my backpack. I then remembered that they were hanging on the banana hook on the fruit bowl.
MrsPete was so impressed with me as she drove into the chaos to deliver the keys. :laugh:

I now use combination locks..
 

ColinJ

Puzzle game procrastinator!
I was out riding a few summers back when a wasp flew down the front of my jersey. I leapt off my bike and starting slapping my chest and and tummy regions in the desperate hope of killing it before it stung me.

When I stopped, I could feel a little lump under my jersey and concluded that I'd dispatched the wasp so I lifted the jersey to brush its corpse away, only for the stunned creature to wake up and start buzzing in a very intimidating fashion! :ohmy:

I panicked and tried to swat it off me, but only succeeded in knocking it down the front of my bibshorts! I experienced a sense of full-on terror and started leaping up and down, pummelling my nether regions and screaming "Die, bastard, DIE!"

The wasp stung me 3 times where it really hurts before I finally managed to flatten it. I don't know what was worse - the throbbing pain down under, or the embarrassment of looking up and seeing a gobsmacked farmer staring at me from the cab of his tractor in the adjacent field! :biggrin: :blush: :sad:
:whistle:
 

cyberknight

As long as I breathe, I attack.
sugar free sweets in general i gather from my mum whos diabetic was told they tend to either bung you up or cause gas
 
Location
España
Cycling through Rural Bavaria singing my little heart out in the middle of nowhere. Came to a gate over the road so stopped, parked the bike and opened it. As I swung it back there were two girls right behind me laughing their heads off asking why I'd stopped singing!

Mortified, I let them through, closed the gate and waited a long time so they'd be well gone.

A few miles later I roll around the bend and there's the two girls holding another gate open for me! Double mortification!
 

cyberknight

As long as I breathe, I attack.
They have no advantage for a diabetic wishing for a carb free snack as for some crazy reason they have the same, if more carbs. My son just has full sugar and takes the insulin.
Mrs ck has pre diabetes she said i dunno what it means but been advised by quacks to watch her diet
 

Arjimlad

Tights of Cydonia
Location
South Glos
Hi and Merry Christmas to you all.
Yesterday i had a somewhat an embarrassing ride out on the bike. It was a filthy hard going 45 mile slog on my Mtb and stopped around 30 miles in for a break. Unfortunately i had been eating way to many of those sugar free mints. From past experience they tend to give me a lot of wind and yesterday was no exception.
I stopped along this quiet lane were behind me was a very high retaining wall to the grounds of a Church. Whilst admiring the view for a few a few moments i let off one hell of a ripper in my trousocks to which even i was impressed with. There was nobody around (well that's what I thought) and all was good in the world.
Then all of a sudden this elderly chap spoke to me from above the wall telling me to show some respect there's a funeral taking place. Before i got chance to apologise he was gone. Feeling totally embarrassed and awful about it all i quickly disappeared into the sunset. As i set off around the lane skirting the church i could see all the cars parked outside the front and funeral was taking place just the other side of the wall were i had stopped.
On a serious side note i feel awful for being so disrespectful and would never of let it happen if i knew what was happening but i genuinely thought no one was around.
Oh well, there's nothing I can do about it now apart from putting it down to experience
Ah - the trump of doom !
Can I book you for my funeral, TBA ?
 

DSK

Senior Member
Mine was many years ago when I was around 16, used to love going around corners as low and as fast as possible. One time, I was flew around a corner and the bike broke there and then.... I think it may have been the rear axle that broke but it cost my parents a good few quid to get it repaired.
 
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