Films that massively disappointed......

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PaulB

Legendary Member
Location
Colne
Talking about Shawshank Redemption, here's one causing as much consternation as the fate of the Marie Celeste; when Andy breaks out of prison through the wall in his cell, how did the poster get back over the hole when Andy was the cell's only occupant and he'd scarpered?
 

slowmotion

Quite dreadful
Location
lost somewhere
Terms of Endearment.
Was it brilliant or just a load of ghastly mawkish shite? The latter.
 

martint235

Dog on a bike
Location
Welling
How can you not like "Hostel"? It's the first film ever to put me off my food. "Hostel II" was stretching it a bit though and quite crud.

IJ and the Crystal Skull was truly awful. I don't know how I managed to get half way through it. The Tree of Life with Sean Penn was also utter cr*p.

One film on first watching that I thought was crud was "Lost In Translation". I now love it and can watch it over and over again. Maybe I just got old.
 

ColinJ

Puzzle game procrastinator!
Talking about Shawshank Redemption, here's one causing as much consternation as the fate of the Marie Celeste; when Andy breaks out of prison through the wall in his cell, how did the poster get back over the hole when Andy was the cell's only occupant and he'd scarpered?
Was it stuck on at the top, and he rolled it up to get out and let it unroll once he had gone through? :whistle:

The reason that a lot of people like that the film, and the reason that I do, is that it gives hope that a life of unremitting crap can potentially end in a few years of happiness. I'm hoping that this concept is not a myth ...
 

Chromatic

Legendary Member
Location
Gloucestershire
Independence Day - Utter S***e
Pulp Fiction - S***e

Very disappointed with Contact too, a good idea/storyline not fully realised.

All IMVHO of course.
 

PaulB

Legendary Member
Location
Colne
Was it stuck on at the top, and he rolled it up to get out and let it unroll once he had gone through? :whistle:

The reason that a lot of people like that the film, and the reason that I do, is that it gives hope that a life of unremitting crap can potentially end in a few years of happiness. I'm hoping that this concept is not a myth ...

Makes sense that.
 

Cyclopathic

Veteran
Location
Leicester.
I've edited out the meaningless waffle from your post. Waterworld = good, highly entertaining film. Open Range is a classic western, brilliantly done, even the Cozmeister is on good form. You just can't get over that s***ty film where he pranced around as Robin Hood and it had that crap song in it.

The list of films that I can't get over that involve Kevin Costner is just too long to list. Waterworld is not only a pile it is an extremely expensive pile. Just think of how many good, independent films might have been made for the 5.3 trillion dollars that was spent on waterworld.
Open Range is bound to be a pile because of the charisma sucking qualities of Costner. There isn't an actor alive or dead who could have shone in the presence of this filmic turd.
 

Cyclopathic

Veteran
Location
Leicester.
I accept that Mr Costner does not have the screen presence of a Bogart or a Bogarde, perhaps even of a bogie, but this does not diminish the wider point: Waterworld is an excellent film. This is a fact.

I accept also that his oevre contains some stinkers (almost every other film he made), but this too does not detract from the wider point: Waterworld is an excellent film.

Any merit attaching to JFK, The Postman, The Untouchables or that baseball thingy is despite Costner rather than because of him, but this does not detract from the wider point: Waterworld is an excellent film.

If you can name a better film in which a partly-evolved amphibian human, an orphan, her guardian and a strange Hungarian balloonist battle the forces of evil, as led by Dennis Hopper on their rusting oil tanker, and ultimately prevail despite a series of devastating setbacks and acts of perfidy by said baddies, I'd like to know its name!

Waterworld is excellent and I declare this discussion over, unless anyone wants to tell me how right I am. Which I am!

I indeed would like to continue this discussion by telling you how right you are...Not at all right is how much right you are. Waterworld is just like every other costner film, a weak vessel for his pathetic ego and non existent talent, and a costly one at that. What is a fact is that the release of waterworld actually depreciated the average happiness of the world by an appreciable amount. That one film made the happiness graph actually dip and may well have set in the world wide malaise that is responsible for our current economic problems. The only thing that could have improved the film would have been if the entire cast, crew and executive administration had mysteriously died before it ever got off the drawing board. Now that is a fact. A proper fact. Not just made up one, the like of which seem so common these days.
To recap. Waterworld is sh#t.
 
I indeed would like to continue this discussion by telling you how right you are...Not at all right is how much right you are. Waterworld is just like every other costner film, a weak vessel for his pathetic ego and non existent talent, and a costly one at that. What is a fact is that the release of waterworld actually depreciated the average happiness of the world by an appreciable amount. That one film made the happiness graph actually dip and may well have set in the world wide malaise that is responsible for our current economic problems. The only thing that could have improved the film would have been if the entire cast, crew and executive administration had mysteriously died before it ever got off the drawing board. Now that is a fact. A proper fact. Not just made up one, the like of which seem so common these days.
To recap. Waterworld is sh#t.

So you propose the wholesale slaughter of several echelons of the Californian entertainment industry and justify it with some clearly imagined mumbo-jumbo about a Global Happiness Quotient.

You want facts? I'll give you a fact! I didn't know there were Nazis on this forum! That's a fact for you to put in your... well... Anyway, it's a fact. Not actually a fact, as much as a statement of recent ignorance as to the presence of Nazis on these pages, but somehow factual in basis.

FFS!! How can you possibly justify wiping out several generations (by clear implication) of innocent people involved in making a film of undoubted merit, just to satisfy your cranky belief in some sort of Equilibrium of World Joy?

(On the subject of Joy, we all know who used the slogan Kraft Durch Freude, don't we?)

These people had children and pets and dreams! I suppose you'd kill them too. Your kind always do!

How can you even sleep at night? (and don't say "It's easy, I just put a DVD of Waterworld on".)

You strike me as the kind of person who'd offer to make tea and then put the milk in while the bag was still in the cup. Murderer!!!!
 

swee'pea99

Squire
Stephen King stories almost always make better movies precisely because he is a workmanlike writer, and his books are all surface - they have so little beyond the words. They are just begging to be made into films. They are the opposite of unfilmable books.
What you're actually saying - and rightly - is that Stephen King is no writer; what he is, though, is a master storyteller. That's why his books make such great films - because (almost) every great film is at heart the telling of a great story.
 

Flying_Monkey

Recyclist
Location
Odawa
What you're actually saying - and rightly - is that Stephen King is no writer; what he is, though, is a master storyteller. That's why his books make such great films - because (almost) every great film is at heart the telling of a great story.

I think that's about right on King. However, great films needn't have any conventional story at all...
 

asterix

Comrade Member
Location
Limoges or York
I hate it when they novelise a perfectly good film, just to cash in on the popularity.

They did that with that one with Charlton Heston getting the Jews out of Egypt. It became a colossal bestseller, but the film was way better.

It always is.


Not for me. With a book you can use your own imagination based on the story; with a film someone, a director, an actor, a cameraman, does the job for you and I often find the result disappointing.
 
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