Friday funny,well a bit funny anyway.

[Landslide]

How many amoebas does it take to change a lightbulb?

1. No, 2! No, 4! No, 8! No, 16! No, 32! No, 64...

 

[TheDoctor]

How many computer programmers does it take to change a lightbulb?

None - programmers won't touch a hardware fault...

 

[Mr Pig]

Some good ones here :0)

How many transsexuals does it take to change a light bulb.
Depends if it's sure it really wants to change.

 

[Fnaar]

How many diehard feminists does it take to change a lightbulb?
I don't know, Mr Fnaar, how many?
Three.
Why's that, Fnaar?
One to change the bulb, and two to discuss the passive role of the socket.

 

[Hover Fly]

How many Fnaars does it take to change a lightbulb?
Two, one to change it, and one to remind him when he last changed it. (5th Oct 2007)

 

[Mr Pig]

How many Darwinists does it take to chage a light bulb?

None. Scientists have established that the early earth had in abundance all of the materials needed for light bulbs. There was sand. Bauxite. Tungsten. And plenty of electrons. There is absolutely no question among credible scientists that a functioning light bulb could arise from these. The only debate is about which of many possible physical pathways resulted in the light bulb.

 

[Piemaster]

How does Alex Ferguson change a light bulb?

He just holds it up as the world revolves around him

 

[montage]

Went for a driving test the other day, and I accidently bumped into the car infront at some traffic lights. When the driver came out with a cross expression on his faced, I was shocked to see he was a midget. When he got to my car window he said "I'm not happy!"

To which I replied...."which one are you then?"

 

[montage]

A man goes into a library and asks for a book on suicide.

The librarian says; "F*** off, you won't bring it back."

 

[montage]

The last person to enter parliament with honest intentions was Guy Fawkes.

 

[Mr Pig]

The librarian says; "F*** off, you won't bring it back."

Like that one :0)

 

[Mr Pig]

How many nuclear engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

Seven. One to install the new bulb and six to figure out what to do with the old one for the next 10,000 years

 

[Cubist]

How many Yorkshiremen does it take to change a lightbulb?

All of them. One to do it, and the rest to moan about the price.

 

[Cubist]

The phone was ringing the other day, so I picked it up and said "Good afternoon,Wetherby 43578, who is speaking please?" and a voice said
"You are."

 

[Cubist]

I backed a horse to win the other day at ten to one.

It came in at half-past two.