Happiness Stan
Well-Known Member
Reporting a failed attempt to assassinate Paul McCartney:
"Top Mop Top Pot Shot Plot Flops"
"Top Mop Top Pot Shot Plot Flops"
Funniest newspaper headlines
- Thread starter PaulB
- Start date
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Vidor06
Long term loafer
- Location
- Deepest, darkest Belfast
My fav is from Scotland a few years ago when Celtic were beaten by Inverness Caledonian Thistle in the cup and the headline was
Super Cali go Ballistic Celtic are Attrocious
So simple but so good.
Super Cali go Ballistic Celtic are Attrocious
So simple but so good.
Vidor06
Long term loafer
- Location
- Deepest, darkest Belfast
Damn Brains. Too quick.
Hover Fly
Lazy so and so
- Location
- Besides the lake, beneath the trees
Scotmitchy
Senior Member
- Location
- Scotland
Was going to post that one.
I've tried to dream up a few crackers in my time, but often have vetoed them on the grounds of taste - one my ed refused to use in our local paper appeared the next day in the Sun when they picked up the story.
Variety's headlines are worthy of 'Teef 'n' Rich
Sticks nix hicks pix' - apparently cinemagoers in rural areas weren't keen on films about films set in rural areas
My favourite of all time appeared in the Bucks Free Press in the late 80s
'Tring prepares for Nuclear War'.
Berkhamsted had better watch out....
Sticks nix hicks pix' - apparently cinemagoers in rural areas weren't keen on films about films set in rural areas
My favourite of all time appeared in the Bucks Free Press in the late 80s
'Tring prepares for Nuclear War'.
Berkhamsted had better watch out....
darth vadar
Über Member
My local paper ran a story about domestic violence under the heading of:
"WOMAN PUNCHED IN LOVE TRIANGLE"
Well, it made me chuckle!!
"WOMAN PUNCHED IN LOVE TRIANGLE"
Well, it made me chuckle!!
Tim Bennet.
Entirely Average Member
- Location
- S of Kendal
A sub-headline from The Times (or Daily Express) in 1955, that was split to fit in the columns:
Sir Vivian
Fuchs off to
Antarctica
Sir Vivian
Fuchs off to
Antarctica
Funny, that. I would have been around 5 at the time, but I distinctly remember seeing newspaper accounts (it would have been an 'exciting' story for a small child like me). My parents were meticulous in explaining that the name was pronounced 'foochs' ('oo' as in 'foot', 'ch' as in 'loch'). At the time I was innocent of any innuendo, of course...
Mad Doug Biker
Just a damaged guy.
- Location
- Craggy Island
That's a reasonably mild tongue twister surely??
Anyway, my favourite is the well known 'Man survives fatal accident'.
Also, I know this isn't funny at all, but I have always had a strange image in my head when I see headlines like'Mum fights for life'.
What I see in my head is something along the lines of a Mum in a boxing or wrestling ring fighting for someone called Life.
Yes yes, I know I'm strange.
rustychisel
Well-Known Member
- Location
- Adelaide, Australia
is it apocryphal?? We were always told this one was true. Western Desert 1942, Montogomery's great offensive after El Alamein, the Times headlines read "EIGHTH ARMY PUSH BOTTLES UP GERMANS"
meenaghman
Guru
During the 1980s Charles Haughey then Taoiseach was alleged to have been having an affair, and the woman's husband found out and clocked him leaving him with quite a bit of facial bruising. The story put out at the time was that he'd injured himself in a fall from a horse. The Irish Independent lead the following day with "Haughey hurt in riding incident".
