HELP!!

[G-Zero]

I can't afford a divorce and have a conflict coming up at the end of the month that may very well end up in one, unless the combined imagination of Cycle Chat can bail me out ;-)

Wednesday 27th May sees us heading down to Lymington on the south coast for a long time in the planning, family wedding, which under the threat of castration, I cannot miss.

Thursday 28th May sees the Pearl Izumi Tour Series visiting Durham and there's not much cycling wise that visits the home town, and after missing the last visit due to work, I would like to see this one.

 

[ufkacbln]

I remember many years ago, one of the other guys in the mess was due to to go home to his girlfriend, but there was a Mess Dinner so he wanted to stay.

We arranged an official phone call saying he was now on a duty weekend and that his leave was cancelled

Sorted.....

So we went out into Portsmouth on Friday evening, and on our way back bumped into said girlfriend who had decided to come down and visit him!

The conversation that ensued was rather heated and impolite

 

[Markymark]

Castration??

The fact you're even asking means you have no balls.

 

[G-Zero]

Castration??

The fact you're even asking means you have no balls.

That's part of the problem, I'm rather attached to them.

 

[Captain Scarlet]

Tell her you want to go and watch. Go to wedding and drive back after the party has finished. Roads will be quiet, everyones a winner.

 

[Dommo]

Miss that one and make a big deal about it... So much so that a week-long trip to France to watch the tour is the only way to make up for it.

 

[Drago]

Fake your own death.

 

[G-Zero]

Miss that one and make a big deal about it... So much so that a week-long trip to France to watch the tour is the only way to make up for it.

Thinking that is the way forward

 

[contadino]

I'm sure you can think of a way to get the wedding called off. Dob the groom in for the stag do, dig up an ex with a grudge, fake an existing certificate of marriage, etc..

I'm sure the family will see the funny side eventually.

 

[Racing roadkill]

The pearl Izumi is on the Isle of Wight on the 14th of May. Head down to Lymington to 'finalise some details', then 'accidentally' make it over to the island, on the ferry. Job's a good'un .