How do you control internet access for your kids?

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Milkfloat

An Peanut
Location
Midlands
I am very tech savvy and as a kid would have worked my way around any block. I have no doubt that my kids will be the same as they are showing considerable technical skill already. I go for the low tech approach of talking to them and discussing what is going on. To be fair to their school they have been well versed about stranger danger and staying safe online. My daughter has just started getting into social media through some connect games she plays. She comes to me when she wants to 'add somebody' and to show me the privacy settings she has used. I am confident that trying to block things just won't work and that the best defence is between her ears.
 
https://www.opendns.com
And set router to only allow certain devices and block all others unless you authorise it.

And talk to them :smile:
 
OP
OP
KneesUp

KneesUp

Guru
Thanks for all the replies. Just to clarify, I did say in my opening post that I'm very much in favour of teaching her to be responsible - and I should have said that the only computer she uses for the internet at the moment is in the kitchen - when she does use it, it's when a parent is cooking. You're all absolutely correct that teaching her not to give out information and so on is the best thing to do.

I think I was more thinking of protecting her from the many ways companies (and individuals, I suppose) might try to exploit her online rather than to stop her seeing things, to be honest. She has my old laptop but only uses it for offline stuff, and it's running Linux so it's pretty secure anyway I guess, compared to Windows at least.

The time thing isn't an issue at the moment because she never takes any device upstairs anyway. I used to work in schools, and also in IT, so I know kids tend to find ways around things - I was thinking of connecting the proxy directly to the router which in turn only provide internet access to it (filtered by MAC address or something) and securing those settings via password, but I suppose she could if she wanted just put a clean install on the proxy because she'd have physical access to it (because it'd be behind the tv next to the router) - I would imagine that when it got to that stage I'd accept that she knew what she was doing :smile: (And as I typed that it occurred to me that she could get a PAYG data dongle when she's older anyway)
 

KnackeredBike

I do my own stunts
As has been said kids will get around any restrictions if they want to. I know the Daily Mail says that they will be watching people being beaten to death and go off to join Isis by the time they're fifteen but honestly I saw boobs online as a sweaty teenager and I still seem vaguely well adjusted. Sometimes as a parent you need to concede you cannot protect your children from every objectionable thing ever.
 

Globalti

Legendary Member
I listened to an interesting programme on R4 about data security in which they wheeled out some government expert. His point was: "If you're tempted to put personal information out on websites like Facebook my strong advice is: don't, just don't. Once it's out there, it's out there and we have no idea how that data will be used or abused in the future."
 

subaqua

What’s the point
Location
Leytonstone
[QUOTE 4739839, member: 76"]You can't control it. They will get around anything you put in place.[/QUOTE]

they won't if you do it right.

the AV and firewall software ( McAfee) allows me to set content and time. windows also allows me to restrict time .

currently its fully open for time and guess what.

yup it is being used properly and devices are closed down a few minutes before the curfew.

content is restricted with the odd exception for weird algorithms ( BBC news gets blocked ?? )

strong passwords is the one key thing to prevent them overriding . the router wifi password gets changed frequently too. so if they don't do their chores etc they only get access via the desktop in the living room
 

nickyboy

Norven Mankey
they won't if you do it right.

the AV and firewall software ( McAfee) allows me to set content and time. windows also allows me to restrict time .

currently its fully open for time and guess what.

yup it is being used properly and devices are closed down a few minutes before the curfew.

content is restricted with the odd exception for weird algorithms ( BBC news gets blocked ?? )

strong passwords is the one key thing to prevent them overriding . the router wifi password gets changed frequently too. so if they don't do their chores etc they only get access via the desktop in the living room

Kids just ask to use their mate's unrestricted smartphone. No amount of algorithms, passwords, timers will stop that.

Really I think once they are at an age where they are spending time with friends independent of parents you just have to trust them and bin the parental controls cos they don't work.
 

Sandra6

Veteran
Location
Cumbria
Turn that off and What are you doing? work for us
No, seriously, we've never had strict controls on these things.
When we first started allowing them to use the pc we had restrictions on it, so they could only use sites that were pg rated as it were, but that impacts on their ability to google stuff for homework so we stopped. When they were younger they could only use the pc or laptop in a family room anyway, but now they're older and possibly more likely to be up to no good, they have their own devices which I can't take control of as they pay for them themselves.
If we get mad at them we turn the internet off though. That's fun.
I think trusting them and educating them goes much further than attempting to control what they're doing.
 

subaqua

What’s the point
Location
Leytonstone
Kids just ask to use their mate's unrestricted smartphone. No amount of algorithms, passwords, timers will stop that.

Really I think once they are at an age where they are spending time with friends independent of parents you just have to trust them and bin the parental controls cos they don't work.
Did you not read post properly . They do use things correctly. That's why it's unlocked on time.

The threat is there if they do, just like prosecution for bad driving .......
 

Smithbat

Getting there, one ride at a time.
Location
Aylesbury
When FT was younger, the only computer was in the living room and could only be used when I was there. As she got older and had a mobile phone and tablet, the agreement was that I would always know her passwords and her unlock codes. I also had a program that relayed her internet history into a .txt file that I could access. The proviso being that if she lived under my roof then she lived by my rules. As I instigated this from the very beginning, it has been the norm and she never questioned it. Occasionally I would have a look to check there was no inappropriate sites or messages, but I haven't done so since she was about 15. She is now a month off 18 and I have no desire to know what she looks at.

You know your kids better than anyone else, if you set rules early and they abide by them then trust is earned, in my case because I was not avidly checking her phone every 10 minutes then the trust worked the other way too.
 
OP
OP
KneesUp

KneesUp

Guru
I started the thread as I'd just read a load of stuff from my kid's school about their internet policy, and I guess I was thinking that she's going to want to use it more at home as she gets older so perhaps I ought to think about doing something at home. As I say, she rarely goes online at the moment - a bit of wikipedia here and there is about all she does.

I don't really know what I want to protect her from in a way that could be encoded into a set of rules for a proxy, if I'm honest.

they won't if you do it right.

the AV and firewall software ( McAfee) allows me to set content and time. windows also allows me to restrict time .

currently its fully open for time and guess what.

yup it is being used properly and devices are closed down a few minutes before the curfew.

content is restricted with the odd exception for weird algorithms ( BBC news gets blocked ?? )

strong passwords is the one key thing to prevent them overriding . the router wifi password gets changed frequently too. so if they don't do their chores etc they only get access via the desktop in the living room

Having sites that are fine blocked (such as the BBC) is one of the things I wanted to avoid - I don't want her to know that it's restricted, if I do restrict it. Whilst it seems like your kids are using it properly, I'd be amazed if they can't eventually defeat the software if the blocking is done at the level of the device connecting. It's easy to backup a phone, reset it and then re import the data minus the parental controls. Equally it's simple to run Linux off a USB stick - presumably if Windows doesn't boot, the device will still be allowed to connect because most routers only filter by MAC address. ANd of course they could just install TOR and connect via a proxy ...
 

nickyboy

Norven Mankey
Did you not read post properly . They do use things correctly. That's why it's unlocked on time.

The threat is there if they do, just like prosecution for bad driving .......

Sorry I must have misinterpreted the fact you restrict content and you change passwords frequently.

I have never wanted internet access to be an escalating tech battle between parents and kids as I want the kids to believe I trust them. I prefer to trust them to make the right decisions which seems to have worked out OK but each to their own
 

subaqua

What’s the point
Location
Leytonstone
Sorry I must have misinterpreted the fact you restrict content and you change passwords frequently.

I have never wanted internet access to be an escalating tech battle between parents and kids as I want the kids to believe I trust them. I prefer to trust them to make the right decisions which seems to have worked out OK but each to their own

so you leave all the pron sites available for access ?? I don't as a few innocent clicks from a respectable site can lead you to all sorts of weird stuff.

funily enough though they have never been accessed when I look at the logs , which shows the trust thing works.

bold to highlight for the hard of reading and understanding.

I change passwords frequently to get the kids to do the jobs they need to. like washing up after tea. and keeping room clean etc. if they don't do that they get priveliges removed . when I was a kid it was removal of fiction books or televison programmes

it is also a very very good idea for security of your own network to change password for wifi regularly. you do wnat to keep your network secure ??
 
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