How to deal with bike thieves
- Thread starter earth
- Start date
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Rob3rt
Man or Moose!
- Location
- Manchester
Lol, I might buy a top tube pad for my fixie, proper hipster style (I have to carry it up stairs into my appartment or office so I will use this as an excuse - protection for the shoulder 
) and hide a note in there for theives just incase.
) and hide a note in there for theives just incase.
Russell Allen
Well-Known Member
About 18 years ago when I was a keen motorcyclist, theft of motorcycles was totally rife, you couldnt leave a bike parked anywhere without serious additional security. Anyway to the point ...there was an article/interview in one of the bike magazines about a group of (balaclava clad) guys who used go out at night, to park a bike in a likely spot, then wait quietly in a transit van nearby. I dont have to describe the rest of the scenario but suffice to say we all laughed at the tales of little bike thieving scrotes getting some therapy coutesy of the van load of vigilantes. I'm not advocating this behavior but it did give us a enormous great belly laugh. Bikes are stolen because people will buy them with little chance of getting caught. I cover all parts on my bikes with UV pen postcodes, and keep notes of the frame numbers. For the epidemic to end both the thieves and the buyers need to feel there is a much greater chance of getting caught. In Holland and Sweden I believe that bicycle theft is considered far closer to car theft.
Just my two penneth
Russell Allen
Just my two penneth
Russell Allen
juanpelota
New Member
- Location
- New Eltham
Some very interesting theories about bike theft on this forum. I'm not particularly swayed by the argument which suggests that so long as there's a market for stolen bikes there will always be stolen bikes. It's a bit like the argument for prostitution which says that as long as there are men willing to pay for it, it will always be there. I think that like stolen bikes, this is blame shifting a little.
If the said prostitute didn't have the 'thing' that these men want, or wasn't prepared to negotiate terms for the use of it, then like the stolen bike, the market would not exist.
Anyway, the title of this thread was 'How to deal with bike thieves'. My suggestion is this.
Take them to a disused aircraft hangar, somewhere in the middle of Essex or Kent miles from anywhere, hang them from a large hook suspended from a beam in the ceiling. Then apply a liberal dosage of a cat of nine tails, each bearing a one inch nail at the end of each 'tail' which has been soaked in battery acid. Repeat the dose until they're cured.
Might appear a little harsh I know, but s*d all else seems to work.
<tongue in cheek> <\tongue in cheek>
If the said prostitute didn't have the 'thing' that these men want, or wasn't prepared to negotiate terms for the use of it, then like the stolen bike, the market would not exist.
Anyway, the title of this thread was 'How to deal with bike thieves'. My suggestion is this.
Take them to a disused aircraft hangar, somewhere in the middle of Essex or Kent miles from anywhere, hang them from a large hook suspended from a beam in the ceiling. Then apply a liberal dosage of a cat of nine tails, each bearing a one inch nail at the end of each 'tail' which has been soaked in battery acid. Repeat the dose until they're cured.
Might appear a little harsh I know, but s*d all else seems to work.
<tongue in cheek>
<\tongue in cheek>
e-rider
Banned member
- Location
- South West
well, if that is the case it doesn't work becasue bike theft in Holland is high
Bike theft in Holland might be high but I have been to Sweden and seen people get off their bicycle, leave it outside a shop or work place, return to it hours later, get on and ride away. Apparently no locks. Either the penalty is very strict or people just don't need to steal them.
