winjim
Smash the cistern
Surely everyone knows of the evil wizard Zargothrax, dark emperor of Dundee, the bane of Cowdenbeath, the scourge of Auchtermuchty, arch-foe of the questlords of Inverness.https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Welfare_in_Finland
The old duffer will be fine. I do wonder how many people think that Lapland is fictional, like Timbuktu or Auchtermuchty.
He was once listed on the Auchtermuchty Wikipedia page as a notable resident but somebody edited him out.