If Bike Brands where Cars Brands?

Page may contain affiliate links. Please see terms for details.

Cyclopathic

Veteran
Location
Leicester.
This thread is much too jolly. I need to provoke a reaction.

All these carbon, poo-sh1te, whizz-bang, look-at-my-team-kit-lycra, rolling examples of conspicuous consumption and self-absorbtion are the convertible Lexus of cycling.

All about being seen on and being talked about at the golf club or at a work dinner... Little to do with cycling, as the convertible lexus is little to do with driving. Tomorrow's landfill in a bland, monochrome world of consumerist lust and retail one-upmanship. Carbon and science in perfectly pointless fusion, rendered odourless excreta.

All steel bikes (particularly my steel bikes) are 1960s Alfa Romeo Giuliettas or Zagato-bodied Lancias. Beautiful and you just know the designers knew a thing or two about food and wine.

Rigid-forked early MTBs are 1959 Humber Super Snipes. Glorious and utterly pointless in equal measure, but the world would be a duller place without them.

This may not be a serious post. As ever, I am right and any dissent is groundless.
I take issue with your posted opinion. I bought a carbon fibre bottle cage to replace my old and overly heavy alloy one and have made a saving of 1.37 grammes. This has made all the difference in the world to my average speed and my commute times as well as immeasurably improving the handling and responsiveness of my "machine". Alternatively it means I can squeeze an extra 1.37ml of high energy, isotonic, esoteric drink into my bottle to keep me sustained for longer in the saddle. And all that for only £45 + postage.
 
I take issue with your posted opinion. I bought a carbon fibre bottle cage to replace my old and overly heavy alloy one and have made a saving of 1.37 grammes. This has made all the difference in the world to my average speed and my commute times as well as immeasurably improving the handling and responsiveness of my "machine". Alternatively it means I can squeeze an extra 1.37ml of high energy, isotonic, esoteric drink into my bottle to keep me sustained for longer in the saddle. And all that for only £45 + postage.

Oh dear, oh dear, oh dear. You just don't get it, do you?

You feel the need yet again to give your so-called opinion on a matter with which you are clearly unfamiliar.

Writing as a Cat-19 racer with almost some experience of hills and corners, I can assure you that everything you have thought since early childhood is wrong, wrong, wrong. Everything. If you cared as little as you understood, you would be twice as likely to have failed to understand all those things about which you clearly care not one jot.

Your use of so-called 'facts' to back up your perverse and wrong-headed logic shows that you know less and care less about cycling than the pet gerbil I had when I was seven. Maybe not less, but certainly no more.

Clearly (if you'd bothered to think about it and not just trot out tired, unfounded myths) you'd be aware that the rotational mass of a wheel is a function of the rider remaining seated while climbing by using quadrilaterally extraposed muscle groups asymmetrically in short, anaerobic herds of sustained energy-graft manipulation.

It's what Lance Armstrong did - and remember, he didn't win the TdF more times than anyone else in history hasn't won it.

Now, please take your puerile prejudices elsewhere and leave the erudition to me.
 
Steel Colnago (Mexico and similar) = 1955 Lancia Aurelia GT Coupe = Gilera Saturno (the new one).

Team carbon bikes ridden in team kit = 1998 Vauxhall Corsas with huge tailpipes and annoying, loud music playing through open windows.
 

defy-one

Guest
Giant = BMW....... happy

uploadfromtaptalk1355089092977.jpg
 

Cyclopathic

Veteran
Location
Leicester.
Oh dear, oh dear, oh dear. You just don't get it, do you?

You feel the need yet again to give your so-called opinion on a matter with which you are clearly unfamiliar.

Writing as a Cat-19 racer with almost some experience of hills and corners, I can assure you that everything you have thought since early childhood is wrong, wrong, wrong. Everything. If you cared as little as you understood, you would be twice as likely to have failed to understand all those things about which you clearly care not one jot.

Your use of so-called 'facts' to back up your perverse and wrong-headed logic shows that you know less and care less about cycling than the pet gerbil I had when I was seven. Maybe not less, but certainly no more.

Clearly (if you'd bothered to think about it and not just trot out tired, unfounded myths) you'd be aware that the rotational mass of a wheel is a function of the rider remaining seated while climbing by using quadrilaterally extraposed muscle groups asymmetrically in short, anaerobic herds of sustained energy-graft manipulation.

It's what Lance Armstrong did - and remember, he didn't win the TdF more times than anyone else in history hasn't won it.

Now, please take your puerile prejudices elsewhere and leave the erudition to me.
I can see that talking to you and those of your "ilk" would be a waste of my time and therefor refuse to respond in any way shape or form. I don't care how many cats you have raced and do not see what that has to do with the matter "at" hand. I also commend your childhood gerbil on its obviously encyclpoeaeidic knowledge of all matters cycling. Simple facts are an all too easy get out for people who have no proper first hand experience. I have felt the difference made by 1.37 grams less on my fat tube and I can assure you it is most tangible, at least it is to some one of my riding experience if not to your ilk. I could go on to further disprove all that what you said before by using lots of extremely big complicated words that you would have to go and look "up" in a dictionary but that would be beneath me and make you feel foolish and that is just not what I am about, but I wanted you and everyone else to know that I could if I wanted but that I just don't want to. Unlike you and your ilk I am above being petty. I will not be commenting any further on this matter as it would clearly not do a bit of good against a ruffian like yourself, therefore this and only this post is in any way valid as the last word on the subject and any further posts about it will technically be on a different matter and not count to the total of this particular issue which I have obviously won, both by having the most sound reasoning and the last word, which by reading this you have tacitly agreed to, signed and had witnessed by "dint" of in being on a public forum.
P.s You are no doubt ugly and your mother or spouse dress you in funny clothes.
 
Had to add this:

Was talking to a friend and mentioned the concepts in this thread. He said "You're bang on about Boardman being Fords. When you buy a brand new one, you're dead proud, showing it off to everyone, telling everyone about it. Then a year later, when everyone has one anyway, you just shut up and use the thing!"
 
Top Bottom