If you HAD to eat a rhinoceros.....

[Crackle]

Well, I am looking out of my office window as we speak, and I see neither rabbit nor rhino, so from my expermental testing, I would have to say that the evidence points to there being equal numbers of rabitts and rhinos in the UK.

Or, your window needs cleaning.

 

[papercorn2000]

oh dear. I know you're young but...

Rhinoceroses live in Africa and Asia. They are herbivores. That means they don't eat meat. I won't start on why you think a rhinoceros in this country would be eating chicken, which is not a wild native, instead of, say, a rabbit or a hedgehog which is.... I think most chicken farms are fairly well proofed against an animal unable to jump over or tunnel under a fence.

Do you really think that a flimsy fence would stop a hungry rhino?

For the record, I have been chased by a rhino.

 

[Andy in Sig]

In answer to the OP, I would buy a very powerful rifle in order to the meet the sensible condition laid down in post #2.

 

[Maz]

I hear Spearmint Rhino is really tasty.

 

[Arch]

Do you really think that a flimsy fence would stop a hungry rhino?

For the record, I have been chased by a rhino.

Some large short sighted animals can be fooled into thinking something is more solid than it is, so you might be able to trick it that way, if you covered the fence with a tarp or something.

When were you chased by a rhino?

 

[papercorn2000]

In South Africa some years ago...

"Is that another white rhino?"
"Don't think so"
"Why won't my camera focus on it"?
"'COS IT'S MOVING TOWARDS US AT HIGH SPEED!!!!!"
"AAAAAAAAAAAAARGH!"

 

[mickle]

I've been chased by a hippo.

 

[Hover Fly]

...I think most chicken farms are fairly well proofed against an animal unable to jump over or tunnel under a fence.

But rhinos can jump.

 

[Arch]

But rhinos can jump.

Can they? Not very high,. I would imagine.

<prepares to be bombarded with youtube images of rhinos doing pole vault>

 

[Arch]

Having searched on youtube for 'rhino jump' motorised buggies called Rhinos don't count...

 

[Hover Fly]

4 or 5 feet for an Indian rhino, which have flexible joints between the thick plates of their skin.

 

[papercorn2000]

I refer you to my previous argument. Rhinos don't jump 'cos they don't need to!

 

[Globalti]

I've eaten at Carnivore restaurants in Nairobi and Johannesburg, where I have tried all kinds of meats including ostrich, zebra, giraffe, kudu, impala, wildebeest, which stampeded through my guts and crocodile, which was disgusting.

Never rhino or hippo though.

 

[Greedo]

Freeze you diseased rhinoceros pizzle!!!!!!!!!!

 

[LLB]

I've eaten horse - quite rich. I imagine rhino would be lean and tough - probably need to be stewed for a long time.

My friend does a lot of zoo work treating these animals for various musculo-skeletal problems, and he said to me that they don't have the tough hide of an elephant even if it looks like that (apparently) - pics of some of his animal work below...