betty swollocks
large member
One of my neighbours is a forty year old woman with Downs Syndrome. She's about four foot nothing, has a mouth full of rotting teeth in a squashed up ugly, but curiously cute face and takes a schadenfreudian delight in embarrassing people in public places. Needless to say, her hide is as thick as a hippo's!
I was out with her yesterday and while we were browsing in the hushed halls of our local Waterstones, she suddenly cocked her leg and emitted the loudest and most dribblesome fart you ever did hear. All other browsers looked round: I could feel myself going red.
"MARY!" I exclaimed in mock indignation.
"It's my hobby," she replied, beaming at me.
"Well, take up stamp collecting instead then." Was the best I could think of.
I was out with her yesterday and while we were browsing in the hushed halls of our local Waterstones, she suddenly cocked her leg and emitted the loudest and most dribblesome fart you ever did hear. All other browsers looked round: I could feel myself going red.
"MARY!" I exclaimed in mock indignation.
"It's my hobby," she replied, beaming at me.
"Well, take up stamp collecting instead then." Was the best I could think of.
But I couldn't hold it in: I slowly slowly I released it, in all its it fragrant glory, and continued nonchalantly to talk to the tramp. The odour eventually reached the nostils of my fellow-passengers, and ALL bar ONE reacted. I too feigned disgust, cos I felt that a lynch mob might be sent out to find the guilty party. Only the suited fellow didn't seem affected (he must have had a cold, or something) and the tramp noticed this. Loudly and accusingly he shouted something like 'Was ist das stinken? Was das Sie?' at the suited man. The whole compartment was staring daggers at him, I was just concentrating on not pi$$ing myself laughing or, worse, farting even more. Fukking hell, it was funny!
