Joke

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Greedo

Guest
A mature lady gets pulled over for speeding...

Older Woman: Is there a problem, Officer?
Traffic Cop: Yes ma'am, I'm afraid you were speeding.

Older Woman: Oh, I see.

Traffic Cop: Can I see your license please?

Older Woman: Well, I would give it to you but I don't have one.

Traffic Cop: Don't have one?

Older Woman: No. I lost it 4 years ago for drunk driving.

Traffic Cop: I see...Can I see your vehicle registration papers please.

Older Woman: I can't do that.

Traffic Cop: Why not?

Older Woman: I stole this car.

Traffic Cop: Stole it?

Older Woman: Yes, and I killed and hacked up the owner.

Traffic Cop: You what!?
Older Woman: His body parts are in plastic bags in the trunk if you want to see

The traffic cop looks at the woman and slowly backs away to his car while calling for back up. Within minutes 5 police cars circle the car. A senior officer slowly approaches the car, clasping his half drawn gun.

Officer 2: Ma'am, could you step out of your vehicle please!

The woman steps out of her vehicle.

Older woman: Is there a problem sir?

Officer 2: My colleague here tells me that you have stolen this car and murdered the owner.

Older Woman: Murdered the owner? Are you serious?!

Officer 2: Yes, could you please open the trunk of your car, please.

The woman opens the trunk, revealing nothing but an empty trunk.

Officer 2: Is this your car, ma'am?

Older Woman: Yes, here are the registration papers.
The traffic cop is quite stunned.

Officer 2: My colleague claims that you do not have a driving license.

The woman digs into her handbag and pulls out a clutch purse and hands it to the officer.

The officer examines the license quizzically.

Officer 2: Thank you ma'am, but I am puzzled, as I was told by my officer here that you didn't have a license, that you stole this car, and that you murdered and hacked up the owner!

Older Woman: Bet the lying b*st*rd told you I was speeding, too.
 
;):biggrin::biggrin:

Tick - v.g!
 

Chrisz

Über Member
Location
Sittingbourne
A blonde woman is driving her BMW rather rapidly through town when she gets pulled over for speeding.

The blonde, female police officer asks her for her registration document, license and insurance certificate. The blonde lady is unable to produce any of the said documents.

"Can you at least identify yourself Ma'am?! Asks blonde WPC.

The woman rummages through her handbag, pulls out and opens her compact mirror and says "Yes! That's me!"

"May I have a look please Ma'am?" Asks blonde WPC.

The woman duly hands over the compact mirror. The blonde WPC has a quick look, returns it and replies "Sorry to have bothered you Ma'am. If I had known you were a police officer I wouldn't have stopped you in the first place!"

;)
 
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