Jokes for the Jocks

[walker]

I'm one that didn't

me too.

 

[QuickDraw]

I know it's not really a joke but it's hard to beat your former sig line for impermeability to those south of the border (and probably plenty north of the border):

awnawnoannonioananawnoo

 

[yorkshiregoth]

I must admit that I didna'e get the first one.

 

[Cycling Naturalist]

I only get ones involving Bucky and deep fried mars bars.

 

[magnatom]

I must admit that I didna'e get the first one.

Hint: Say this popular Rab C phrase: I comfy Govan. (more accurately Aye cum fae Govan)

Bigger hint: Govan is a place in Glasgow

Biggest hint of all: Rab C might say this and he lives in Govan! (I work nearby, but I must admit to never having met hi, although I have met plenty like him!)

 

[magnatom]

I know it's not really a joke but it's hard to beat your former sig line for impermeability to those south of the border (and probably plenty north of the border):

awnawnoannonioananawnoo

I must admit this alludes me, although I have a feeling it is football related. Am I right?

 

[Tetedelacourse]

oui.

Enrico Annoni used to play for Celtic and once, at seeing him being brought on in place of a team mate, rumour has it that a supporter turned to his mate and said "aw naw is at annonni on an aw noo?"

 

[magnatom]

oui.

Enrico Annoni used to play for Celtic and once, at seeing him being brought on in place of a team mate, rumour has it that a supporter turned to his mate and said "aw naw is at annonni on an aw noo?"

Makes sense now. I wouldn't really call myself a football fan although I do like the Tim slightly better than any of the others. Shame about last night though.

Should your translation not be "aw naw no annonni on an aw noo?" or where you just trying to help our southern readers?

 

[meenaghman]

More help for those unfamiliar with accents from here..
http://www.ulsterscotsagency.com/wordofulstersctos.asp
We get some fantastic leaflets through the door. Given the makeup of NI population we have rates leaflets in English,Irish (Gaelic), Ulster Scots, Polish, and Chinese as they're the major ethnic groups. But I have to say reading the Ulster Scots stuff leaves me p**sing myself ROTFL.

 

[QuickDraw]

Makes sense now. I wouldn't really call myself a football fan although I do like the Tim slightly better than any of the others. Shame about last night though.

Did you use the wrong smiley at the end of that?

What's the difference between Rangers and my wheelie bin?

Nothing. They both go out on a Wednesday night. Boom boom.

Although a wheelie bin would have done better with that chance Darcheville missed.

To be more serious. In a few days, when it stops hurting, Rangers will realise getting the UEFA cup is a huge acheivement given their draw and that the UEFA cup gives them a much better chance of getting to the sharp end of the tournament.

Anyway that's enough football nonsnese anyone got any more jokes only Scots can understand?

 

[gavintc]

More Irish than Scots and a true story. My daughter was brought up in England but is studying at Edin Uni. She often does short term temp work for an agency. This week, she was contracted to work as telephonist and to take messages for a company in Edinburgh whilst the complete office went out for Xmas lunch. The company name was 'Geogeghan'. She realised after the office had departed that she did not know how to pronounce the name of the company and proceeded to mangle the company name for 4 hours to every caller, trying variations on the theme. It was only last night when she popped round for a bite to eat that she found out how to pronounce the name. Amusingly, no one that called corrected her contorted pronunciations.

 

[domtyler]

Didn't really understand any of that pish.

 

[arranandy]

Pish is a great descriptive word. Nearly as a good as keech

 

[Jacomus-rides-Gen]

Makes sense now. I wouldn't really call myself a football fan although I do like the Tim slightly better than any of the others. Shame about last night though.

Should your translation not be "aw naw no annonni on an aw noo?" or where you just trying to help our southern readers?

oui.

Enrico Annoni used to play for Celtic and once, at seeing him being brought on in place of a team mate, rumour has it that a supporter turned to his mate and said "aw naw is at annonni on an aw noo?"

I still don't understand, but it made me laugh anyway.

Perhaps something to liven up a dull commute Magna? A bit of how to correctly say "aw naw no annonni on an aw noo?" with a straight face!! Seriously though, I would love to hear it rather than attempt to mangle my accent into Scottish and end up sounding Australian!!

 

[mickle]

The only problem wi thus hear forum by the way? Scum like us!

'Whit culur is Hibs strip by the way? A cannae remembur.

'Maroon?

Cheers! I'll hae a pint ae heavy!