Moped menace

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Glow worm

Legendary Member
Location
Near Newmarket
Not strictly a commuting incident this, but there I was enjoying a gentle, sunlit lunchtime ride into the next village (that is on my normal commute) to pick a few things up, and coming back, a moped heading in the opposite direction slows and suddenly, with no indication, turns right, straight at me. I'd probably have gone over if new to cycling or a nervous rider as the twunt missed me by inches.

Anyway I carry on for 20 yards or so, a bit shook up, wondering how I managed to stay upright and then I think, hang on a mo, I'm not having that. So I turned round and went after the bastard.

Luckily, the vacant dick had turned right (at me) into a residential cul-de-sac (Thomas Christian Way, Bottisham by the way). I soon caught up with the moron who amusingly had tried to hide his grotty machine behind a hedge in his garden! clearly expecting me to go for him. Anyway, I very politely asked him what that was all about and why he felt the need to behave like a complete tool. He looked like a rabbit in headlights, clearly worried that a. he'd led me straight to his front door (genius) and b. I was about to rip his head off.

A short 'conversation' later and he started with all the sorrys, SMIDSYs etc. Muppet. I'm hoping that by not going completely ape, or twatting him, (which I won't think twice about next time) he might respect the next cyclist he comes across a bit more- small chance but here's to hoping.

I'm no great fan of the human race in general and sometimes wonder if I'm really part of the same species as there are just so many complete arse*oles about. Amazing how they can ruin a really great ride on a superb day. It's bad enough battling with the motons, so I could do without the aggro from Evil fecking Kneival as well.
 

downfader

extimus uero philosophus
Location
'ampsheeeer
Was he on L plates? Those are the ones I've had problems with in the past, never proper bikers.

Perhaps your little talk will set in when he has a car drive at him in similar circumstances? And being on two wheels its only a matter of time. :smile:
 
OP
OP
Glow worm

Glow worm

Legendary Member
Location
Near Newmarket
Cunobelin said:
Report a bike hidden in the hedge as it looks as if it is stolen and ditched.......

Be a good citizen

could be- I'll go round and get the reg tomorrow. Comically, it looked like he was trying to hide the hideous stinking thing before I caught up with the useless streak of piss. @ Downfader- the bloke was an idiot- if he tries it with a lorry I hope he gets what's coming to him. I'm not in a forgiving frame of mind. Completely pi**ed off with yet another innoccuous, lunchtime saunter on a bicycle in the sunshine being spoilt yet again by the great british public- what is it about a bloke on a bicycle that makes these imbeciles react like this? I've had it with the lot of'em and see where Cranks is coming from giving the whole thing up.

On a tangent, while I'm on a roll- if the news shows one more posh twatt who's had to use a bus for a few hours cos their flight from their Tuscan Villa's been cancelled- I'm throwing a brick through the f*cking telly.
 

downfader

extimus uero philosophus
Location
'ampsheeeer
Glow worm said:
could be- I'll go round and get the reg tomorrow. Comically, it looked like he was trying to hide the hideous stinking thing before I caught up with the useless streak of piss. @ Downfader- the bloke was an idiot- if he tries it with a lorry I hope he gets what's coming to him. I'm not in a forgiving frame of mind. Completely pi**ed off with yet another innoccuous, lunchtime saunter on a bicycle in the sunshine being spoilt yet again by the great british public- what is it about a bloke on a bicycle that makes these imbeciles react like this? I've had it with the lot of'em and see where Cranks is coming from giving the whole thing up.

On a tangent, while I'm on a roll- if the news shows one more posh twatt who's had to use a bus for a few hours cos their flight from their Tuscan Villa's been cancelled- I'm throwing a brick through the f*cking telly.

No need to check his reg, besides it might be a thorny legal issue if you do unless you're buying it. :smile:

I know how you feel. It makes you think how f***ing tragic their lives must be that they have to take things out on others, or act like blind c*cks.

The way I look at it is no one in the worst frame of mind is going to scare me from riding the bike. I've been hit, sworn at, had things thrown at me - f*** em. Theres too much good stuff about cycling to give it up or be dissuaded by morons, mate. Keep at it and remember the good stuff. Perhaps keep a log of the good stuff like:

"I saw a kestrel, did 35mph downhill and did a tasty little hop over a pothole" the otherday. If you're still newish, log how much weight you've lost, or calories burned. Miles ridden. Younger Scallies ridden past and "burned" on the ride. :sad:
 

jonny jeez

Legendary Member
Or...just let it all go and enjoy the ride.

Sorry guys, I'm not digging at you but I do honestly find that the thing I get most upset with on the road is my own reacton to events.

oftentimes people just do stupid stuff and only come up with stupid responces when challanged. If the truth be known they just made a mistake as we are all capable of, if you can find a way to let it go, within 30 seconds you are smiling again and enjoying the time.

If I have had a bad day, my ride is ALWAYS bad, if I let it all slide (for my own health) I enjoy the time on the bike more.

Simplistic I know, and in some eyes, weak...but i just want to enjoy riding not WIN at it.
 

XmisterIS

Purveyor of fine nonsense
OP - are you unfamiliar with the Highway Code as it applies to 16-year-olds on mopeds?

It's like this:

1. Protective clothing is unnecessary. This is because you are 16 and therefore invincible.
2. Indicators are provided for decorative purposes only.
3. Always ride one-handed while texting. You don't need to look at the road ahead because you cannot die (see point 1).
4. Always use the cycle-lane when passing traffic. If there is no cycle lane, your moped will fit into any gap, no matter how small.
5. Always filter past moving double-articulated lorries, no matter how they are indicating. You are immortal and so there is no danger.

etc ...
 
OP
OP
Glow worm

Glow worm

Legendary Member
Location
Near Newmarket
jonny jeez said:
oftentimes people just do stupid stuff and only come up with stupid responces when challanged. If the truth be known they just made a mistake as we are all capable of, if you can find a way to let it go, within 30 seconds you are smiling again and enjoying the time.

Fair points JJ as ever- I'm normally really good at letting things pillocks do go, and rarely react (being a bit of an old hippy at heart). This streak of piss however didn't make a mistake - he deliberately and dangerously tried to ram me off the road. I know what you mean about reacting, but frankly, I'm not taking that sh*t from anyone.
 
OP
OP
Glow worm

Glow worm

Legendary Member
Location
Near Newmarket
downfader said:
"I saw a kestrel, did 35mph downhill and did a tasty little hop over a pothole" the otherday. If you're still newish, log how much weight you've lost, or calories burned. Miles ridden. Younger Scallies ridden past and "burned" on the ride. ;)

Nice idea- I keep a mileage log already so could add bits to that. Funnily enough, talking of birds, I cheered up soon after when I got down the allotment as I heard a grasshopper warbler not 10 yards away- a 1st here for me where I live.
 
OP
OP
Glow worm

Glow worm

Legendary Member
Location
Near Newmarket
XmisterIS said:
OP - are you unfamiliar with the Highway Code as it applies to 16-year-olds on mopeds?

It's like this:

1. Protective clothing is unnecessary. This is because you are 16 and therefore invincible.
2. Indicators are provided for decorative purposes only.
3. Always ride one-handed while texting. You don't need to look at the road ahead because you cannot die (see point 1).
4. Always use the cycle-lane when passing traffic. If there is no cycle lane, your moped will fit into any gap, no matter how small.
5. Always filter past moving double-articulated lorries, no matter how they are indicating. You are immortal and so there is no danger.

etc ...

;):biggrin:
 
Glow worm said:
...talking of birds, I cheered up soon after when I got down the allotment as I heard a grasshopper warbler...

Better than the birds I usually see on Newmarket High Street, especially of a weekend. ;)
 

bauldbairn

New Member
Location
Falkirk
jonny jeez said:
Or...just let it all go and enjoy the ride.

Sorry guys, I'm not digging at you but I do honestly find that the thing I get most upset with on the road is my own reacton to events.

oftentimes people just do stupid stuff and only come up with stupid responces when challanged. If the truth be known they just made a mistake as we are all capable of, if you can find a way to let it go, within 30 seconds you are smiling again and enjoying the time.

If I have had a bad day, my ride is ALWAYS bad, if I let it all slide (for my own health) I enjoy the time on the bike more.

Simplistic I know, and in some eyes, weak...but i just want to enjoy riding not WIN at it.

+1, Good point. :smile:

It's difficult to do Glow Worm - but worth trying. :smile:

It's hard for me too(and strange) - for the first time in my life my criminal record gets checked by my new employer every 6 months(Disclosure Scotland).

Take it from me - a year ago I would have hunted them to the end of the earth for a dangerous/threatening - manouver. ;)
I just take a deep breath and try to look the other way. It doesn't mean I don't swear at them or get pi$$ed off - I just don't drag terrified people out of cars anymore. :biggrin:

Good luck.
 
XmisterIS said:
OP - are you unfamiliar with the Highway Code as it applies to 16-year-olds on mopeds?

It's like this:

1. Protective clothing is unnecessary. This is because you are 16 and therefore invincible.
2. Indicators are provided for decorative purposes only.
3. Always ride one-handed while texting. You don't need to look at the road ahead because you cannot die (see point 1).
4. Always use the cycle-lane when passing traffic. If there is no cycle lane, your moped will fit into any gap, no matter how small.
5. Always filter past moving double-articulated lorries, no matter how they are indicating. You are immortal and so there is no danger.

etc ...

6. THE PIZZA IS GETTING COLD!
 
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