Moral Dilemma

[ComedyPilot]

No offence, but 20 miles is hardly a charitable distance....is it?

 

[ComedyPilot]

I've gone further for a cup of tea and a cake

 

[longers]

The distance is irrelevant though isn't it?

 

[Sam Kennedy]

I know 20 miles is nothing, but the idea was to include people who aren't into cycling.
I'll discuss it with him on the ride if I can't do it for livestrong.

Thank you for all the input by the way!

 

[dellzeqq]

I've lead a charity ride for the restoration of a church - one that, despite living in the village for three years, I visited just the once. You're just doing somebody a favour, not putting your entire mental and spiritual wellbeing on the line.

 

[HobbesChoice]

I understand your dilemma completely! You don't want to be the sort of person who backs out of something you've promised, especially at the last minute.

But I do also agree with everyone that you can't give to a charity if your heart isn't in it, that's not what charity is about. On this I'd say that if your friend has a problem with your request to give to Livestrong instead then that really isn't something you can be responsible for. If he has a problem with it, that really is his problem. You've done more than enough to be given some freedom on your choice of donatee.

Best of luck with leading the ride and very well done for all you've put into this. I really hope your friend comes back without any fuss. He should do, so I hope that's what happens.

 

[gavintc]

I understand your dilemma completely! You don't want to be the sort of person who backs out of something you've promised, especially at the last minute.

But I do also agree with everyone that you can't give to a charity if your heart isn't in it, that's not what charity is about. On this I'd say that if your friend has a problem with your request to give to Livestrong instead then that really isn't something you can be responsible for. If he has a problem with it, that really is his problem. You've done more than enough to be given some freedom on your choice of donatee.

Best of luck with leading the ride and very well done for all you've put into this. I really hope your friend comes back without any fuss. He should do, so I hope that's what happens.

+1. Your moral judgement is correct. You should not simply back out of an agreement to be a cycle guide, equally in my opinion, there is not obligation to financially contribute.

 

[Crankarm]

Is it a genuine registered charity or an excuse for extorting money out of people? If it's bogus why not contact the Charities Commission, if it's still in existence? All genuine charities have a registration number. If a registered charity then you can gift aid, where basically the charity gets the tax back on the money you donate. Great if you are a higher rate tax payer.

Wrt to being conscripted by this acquaitance to take part and then organising the thing - you should have more backbone. Why would you spend so much time on something you fundamentally disagree with? IMHO choose a charity you feel comfortable supporting and which could do with the cash.

 

[ASC1951]

I think Maggot's advice is the most sensible - no point causing offence by saying you are not in favour of the named charity, just say that all your efforts always go into [xyz].

That's what I usually do. Explain that my donations go to www.kiva.org and www.karuna.org - which they genuinely do.

 

[swee'pea99]

It's tricky, but I think you've received good advice, so I won't add my tuppence worth, other than to say (and please don't take this the wrong way) that one positiev thing you can take out of all this is to learn the lesson for next time: never commit yourself to something without being clear and comprehensive about exactly what it is you're committing to. It's a bit like the real life equivalent of making sure you read the small print before you sign.

Whatever you decide, I hope it goes well. And hats off for your willingness to give your time and effort to 'a good cause' - whether or not that's what it turned out to be. Like they say, 'it's the thought that counts'.

 

[trustysteed]

stick to what your headheart is telling you, if it's not for you you, don't do it

 

[trustysteed]

plus he should have explained exactly what it was for

 

[trj977]

You have already made a donation - Your time.

If asked for money tell him straight up, you have domated your time and are not willing to give anything else.

If he gets pi$$ed with this, carry on and tell him that if you had known what it was for he would not have got that!

As previously said, what will you lose? He is hardly your best mate.

 

[Sam Kennedy]

Okay I told him how I felt, and he was okay with it. We had to cancel the ride because there were only about 7 of us doing the ride, and most the people dropped out at the last minute. He said he will organise it for another time, and if it's okay if I don't want to take part.

Now I'm thinking of starting my own charity ride to raise money for livestrong, but I have no idea about insurance or whatever.

 

[Headgardener]

Sam are you a member of the CTC as they might be able to use you ride leading skills.