My bike is ill (poem)

[Archie_tect]

After reading all of this
I think I'm with the Doctor.
Writing poems is alright
but they really should rhyme...

 

[TheDoctor]

Haikus don't rhyme
But they really ought to contain
Seventeen syllab...

Bugger!!

 

[Pat "5mph"]

The situation is dire:
why won't my pump blow up this tire???
Went to work with my old flame
rode back fender mangled in the frame.
What's wrong with my boss?
Kept me late, missed the shops!
The situation is dire:
need a new pump to blow up this tire!

 

[Crackle]

I've got a buggered bb
and I can't get the bloody thing free
I've heaved and puffed
Sworn and garrumphed
And then gave up and made some tea

 

[Archie_tect]

I had a little Dawes bike,
Nothing would it bear,
But a fat old codger,
In lycra with a tear.

 

[Pat "5mph"]

I had a little Dawes bike,
Nothing would it bear,
But a fat old codger,
In lycra with a tear.

How sweet!

 

[Pat "5mph"]

My old banger lost a mudguard:
Gears won't work
Tires are bald
as my pump still won't blow
my new ride rests alone
my old stead, it knows the score
tomorrow it will take me
to work, then back home.

 

[Archie_tect]

One, two, three, four, five
Ever caught up with our Clive?
He doesn't think he goes that fast
cycling into Paris, last.

Why did he end up at the back?
He's more used to the running track.

 

[Monsieur Remings]

Shimano?

SRAMolo?

 

[Sara_H]

My bike is ill,
My bike is ill,
Its shifters have gone for a burton
"No more seven speed", said the man in the shop
"It's time for your bike's final curtain".
"Hold fast!", quoth I, "Young man, do not lie
For although my bank balance is red,
My obsession with bikes means I buy what a like,
So 8-speed the lot, tis not dead".

There's once was a smutster named @Fnaar
Who's shifters were crap like The Spar
He demanded 8 speeds
so he could still ride his steed
But his poems are truly bizarre

 

[TheDoctor]

I had a bike with seven gears
Six of them ain't worked in years.
I hit it with the Fettling Stick
My bike is better now it's fixed.

 

[threebikesmcginty]

I've just tried fitting
A KMC chain
Wish I'd read the instructions
I need a new one again...

 

[threebikesmcginty]

[QUOTE 2980072, member: 259"]If you'd paid some attention
To my previous thread
You'd have ordered some pliers
And it would have been dead
Easy.[/QUOTE]

It's too late now
F***ers in the bin
You can take the b*stard pins out
But they won't go back in

 

[ayceejay]

Fixing a bike without swear
words is as rare as words
that rhyme with Campagnolo

 

[threebikesmcginty]

I've ordered a shimano chain now
When it's on I'll give it a mickle
Looked in Halfords but they were sh1t
So I've ordered one off of Wiggle