No, Mrs Wobbly Ninja Cyclist on your BSO...

[wafflycat]

.. it wasn't me making the horrible honking on the horn sounds behind you. Really. It was the impatient twunt behind me.

Bah!

This evening I went off in the motor to get the 'big shop' in. One particular bit of road in town. Narrow, bend in front and in front of that, hidden from immediate view, mini-roundabout. So there's Mrs Wobbly Ninja Cyclist in front of me. So I held back fro several reasons:- Mrs Ninja Cyclist was very wobbly, the road was narrow, had a RH bend in front, so couldn't see if road was clear in front. So I hels back, giving Mrs Ninja Wobbly Cyclist several car lengths space, so that if she fell off ( she was very, very wobbly), there was room to stop without making her into road pizza.

Cue impatient twunt behind me in his silver p*n*s-substitute.. Sat on my tail. Flashing his lights, revving his engine. Let's see... there was all of ooh... perhaps 100 yards to go before the mini-roundabout? On this narrow road, with bend so you couldn't see if there was oncoming traffic or not..

I'd just like you to know Mrs Wobbly Ninja Cyclist on your BSO, cycling in the gutter, it wasn't me making the impatient motorist sounds, I was actually stopping you from being made into road pizza by the moron behind me, who had no patience and the only place he would have a real p*n*s on his anatomy would be growing out of the top of his head. Sigh...

 

[MartinC]

If there's no room to get past the most entertaing thing to do is:

Stop the car, get out (slowly), examine the back of you car carefully (slowly), look quizzically at the driver who beeped, shrug, walk over and say that you can't see what it is that's wrong with your car but that it was kind of them to let you know anyway.

 

[Maz]

Did Mrs Wobbly Ninja Cyclist give you the middle finger or something, waffly!?!

 

[Arch]

If there's no room to get past the most entertaing thing to do is:

Stop the car, get out (slowly), examine the back of you car carefully (slowly), look quizzically at the driver who beeped, shrug, walk over and say that you can't see what it is that's wrong with your car but that it was kind of them to let you know anyway.

Classic. So much more infuriating if you speak in French or some other language, perhaps.

 

[Arch]

no no, another idea. Get out, slowly, clutching a HUGE adjustable spanner. Walk slowly and menacingly towards the car behind, glowering at the driver, then when at the back of your car, bend down and pretend to tighten up a nut underneath, give a cheery wave and get back in....


Winds them up AND scares them rigid.

 

[wafflycat]

Did Mrs Wobbly Ninja Cyclist give you the middle finger or something, waffly!?!

Yes.

 

[Arch]

Yes.

oh well, you should have knocked her off for that....

I know what you mean though, it's not nice to get blame wrongly, especially when you are going to some trouble to be nice...

 

[wafflycat]

oh well, you should have knocked her off for that....

heh...

I know what you mean though, it's not nice to get blame wrongly, especially when you are going to some trouble to be nice...

never mind, at least she didn't have the moton behind me up her back end!

 

[PBancroft]

If there's no room to get past the most entertaing thing to do is:

Stop the car, get out (slowly), examine the back of you car carefully (slowly), look quizzically at the driver who beeped, shrug, walk over and say that you can't see what it is that's wrong with your car but that it was kind of them to let you know anyway.

Ha! Good idea?

Normally I just slow down a bit when the flash. When they flash again, I slow down a bit more, and again the next time.

Usually they eventually get the idea. Or overtake making interesting gestures.

 

[downfader]

When I'm in the car with my Brother driving, if I see someone tailgate I turn around and stare at them. I think it puts them off and they always edge away

..or blow them kisses

 

[alp1950]

When I'm in the car with my Brother driving, if I see someone tailgate I turn around and stare at them. I think it puts them off and they always edge away

..or blow them kisses

or use your windscreen washers. There is usually some scatter behind & they hate it when their screen gets splashed.

 

[grhm]

or use your windscreen washers. There is usually some scatter behind & they hate it when their screen gets splashed.

My old fiesta had a rear screen washer but the wiper didn't work. I adjusted the spray for just such a purpose - it was suprising effective.

 

[ComedyPilot]

If tail-gated (or rear-wheeled) on a bike, 1/2 a pint of sticky performance-enhancing drink squirted onto the bonnet/windscreen will get the message across.

 

[downfader]

or use your windscreen washers. There is usually some scatter behind & they hate it when their screen gets splashed.

Ahh yes I remember my mother doing that with the old triumph dolimite (sp?) - crap car, but that was one feature it did very well.