Not quite a dilemma or is it?

Should I rekindle the friendship

  • Definitely not

    Votes: 16 53.3%
  • Definitely

    Votes: 9 30.0%
  • Don't know

    Votes: 5 16.7%

  • Total voters
    30
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Amanda P

Legendary Member
You've lived without the relationship all these years, only you can decide how important it is to rekindle it; it sounds as if it's not that important.

If you were to bump into him, how to respond? I'd say, love the sinner, hate the sin. As others have said he's paid the price and, presumably, whether he likes it or not, has had to move on. Maybe it's water under the bridge now.
 

EltonFrog

Legendary Member
You have both moved on, if either of you wanted to stay in touch you would have some how.
 

Shortmember

Bickerton Cyclocross Racing Team groupie
Everybody changes in some way in 25 years ; not always for the better.He certainly won't be the same person you got on with so well all those years ago, so I think it's probably best to leave it in the past.
 

cd365

Guru
Location
Coventry, uk
There is something wrong with someone who abuses the trust of a child (yes a 16 year old at school is a child), he would not be someone that I would want to socialise with.
 

Born2die

Well-Known Member
I normally wouldn't say this as it still worries me how i missed it and thank god he never got near my kid.

but as a lad I went to school with a lad he was a big harmless less than academic lump never hurt a fly after school years we kept an on off friendship catching up from time to time but not close last I heard he went down or 5 years for indecent images of kids and possibly making them! .

Also in my youth my Red Cross 1st aid teacher went down for sex with pupils (again breach of trust teacher pupil) agin I have never spoken to the man again but I can never forget hd name for some reason.

In my case it's clear cut I will never talk to him again in your case you have to listen to your consciousness if you have not seen or heard from him in all these years why now? Could you ever trust him again etc. maybe it's best to live the past to the past and move forward into the unknown
 

surfdude

Veteran
Location
cornwall
if he was that good a friend you would have stayed in contact with him .in the past you would not have had any internet and you would never have found him so i think that as you have not been in contact for so long i would leave well alone .
 

Paulus

Started young, and still going.
Location
Barnet,
I would say yes, meet up and see where the rekindled friendship leads. He has been in trouble and maybe he is looking for old friends so as to get things back on track. You won't know until you meet him. If things are not right you will know very soon after meeting up.
 
OP
OP
vernon

vernon

Harder than Ronnie Pickering
Location
Meanwood, Leeds
if he was that good a friend you would have stayed in contact with him .in the past you would not have had any internet and you would never have found him so i think that as you have not been in contact for so long i would leave well alone .


That's a simplistic view that isn't applicable.
 

classic33

Leg End Member
What was your reason for not staying in touch, anything else other than the physical distance between you & the fact that you only saw him when he came up North. Did you stay in touch whilst he was returning to family up here?
Had a similar experience & I think that in the 27 years since it happenned, I've said less than a dozen words to him. And then only because I was serving him in a shop. Out of choice I've avoided him. I've never said exactly why to anyone. But both of us know the reason why.

What made you go looking for him in the first place though. Was it with an interest in doing what you're now uncertaion about doing? If that is the case, why not make the first move, explain who you are(Daft sounding I know.) but names can be forgotten over the years. If he doesn't respond then I think you'll have had some of your questions answered.

Aware that you might not be able to see this.
 

EltonFrog

Legendary Member
We're both bad at maintaining links. We both tend to leave it to chance encounters.

Then leave it to chance then. I have lost contact with many good freinds over the years, we've moved on, we don't need each other any more. I did rekindle a friendship a while back, I wish I hadn't bothered.
 
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