OP
OP
jayonabike
Powered by caffeine & whisky
- Location
- Hertfordshire
Ordered our Christmas Turkey today
- Thread starter jayonabike
- Start date
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Archie_tect
De Skieven Architek... aka Penfold + Horace
- Location
- Northumberland
...Fitz
martint235
Dog on a bike
- Location
- Welling
Ordering mine tomorrow. 16lb Norfolk Bronze. All be gone by the end of Boxing Day as there's 4 of us and two cats.
I've got to find a way of keeping up the tradition of taking it for a drink on Xmas Eve since I've given up the alcohol. Probably take it for a Mocha instead!
I've got to find a way of keeping up the tradition of taking it for a drink on Xmas Eve since I've given up the alcohol. Probably take it for a Mocha instead!
ScotiaLass
Guru
- Location
- Middle Earth
I usually buy a Turkey crown and a nice gammon, which I boil then roast in honey and orange 
Fnaar
Smutmaster General
- Location
- Thumberland
Please allow me to get this out of my system: Things you can only say at Christmas:
1. I prefer breasts to legs
2. Tying the legs together keeps the inside moist.
3. Smother the butter all over the breasts!
4. If I don’t undo my trousers, I’ll burst!
5. I’ve never seen a better spread!
6. I’m in the mood for a little dark meat.
7. Are you ready for seconds yet?
8. It’s a little dry; do you still want to eat it?
9. Just wait your turn, you’ll get some!
10. Don’t play with your meat.
11. Stuff it up between the legs as far as it will go.
12. Do you think you’ll be able to handle all these people at once?
13. I didn’t expect everyone to come at the same time!
14. You still have a little bit on your chin.
15. How long will it take after you put it in?
16. You’ll know it’s ready when it pops up.
17. Just pull the end and wait for the bang.
18. That’s the biggest bird I’ve ever had!
19. I’m so full, I’ve been gobbling nuts all morning
20. Wow, I didn’t think I could handle all that and still want more!
21. I do like a good stuffing.
1. I prefer breasts to legs
2. Tying the legs together keeps the inside moist.
3. Smother the butter all over the breasts!
4. If I don’t undo my trousers, I’ll burst!
5. I’ve never seen a better spread!
6. I’m in the mood for a little dark meat.
7. Are you ready for seconds yet?
8. It’s a little dry; do you still want to eat it?
9. Just wait your turn, you’ll get some!
10. Don’t play with your meat.
11. Stuff it up between the legs as far as it will go.
12. Do you think you’ll be able to handle all these people at once?
13. I didn’t expect everyone to come at the same time!
14. You still have a little bit on your chin.
15. How long will it take after you put it in?
16. You’ll know it’s ready when it pops up.
17. Just pull the end and wait for the bang.
18. That’s the biggest bird I’ve ever had!
19. I’m so full, I’ve been gobbling nuts all morning
20. Wow, I didn’t think I could handle all that and still want more!
21. I do like a good stuffing.
ScotiaLass
Guru
- Location
- Middle Earth
23. It's too dry...give me something to wash it down with...
threebikesmcginty
Corn Fed Hick...
- Location
- ...on the slake
24 It looks like the last turkey in the shop.
threebikesmcginty
Corn Fed Hick...
- Location
- ...on the slake
25 Dad, P*ss off you twat, you're just an embarrassment.
Oh no, hang on, that was for real!
Oh no, hang on, that was for real!
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Over The Hill
Guru
- Location
- Ridden off into the sunset
Not even got onto basting or what you then do with the meat juice.
I like to turn my bird over half way through and take the covering off near the end.
You have to wake up early on Christmas morning to put it in.
I like to turn my bird over half way through and take the covering off near the end.
You have to wake up early on Christmas morning to put it in.
Over The Hill
Guru
- Location
- Ridden off into the sunset
Why do we still have the silly ritual of ordering a Turkey? Everything else we just expect them to have it in stock.
Beebo
Firm and Fruity
- Location
- Hexleybeef
25, A woman went into the butchers to order an innuendo, he thought about it long and hard; and gave her one.
Fnaar
Smutmaster General
- Location
- Thumberland
We get a frozen one from Morisson's
Only time I've 'been involved' with an ordered one, it cost a fortune, and it all went horribly wrong (but I'll leave that story for another time)
Beebo
Firm and Fruity
- Location
- Hexleybeef
If we didnt have guests over my dad would play "Turkey Chicken". He would leave it as long as possible on Christmas eve to buy a turkey. You can then either pick up a bargain or they have sold out.
Over The Hill
Guru
- Location
- Ridden off into the sunset
We get a frozen one from Morisson's
Only time I've 'been involved' with an ordered one, it cost a fortune, and it all went horribly wrong (but I'll leave that story for another time)
I am still getting over last years fiasco in the OTH house. We were cooking but the in-laws insisted they would get the turkey. So they duly went to worship at the temple of Waitrose, going through the whole ordering and collection on x day fiasco. We then had to make a 60 mile trip to pick the flippin' thing up from them. On the day, the turkey was rather underwhelming and we actually ate it all on Christmas day! To me the best thing about a turkey is having it kicking around for a week to make various meals out of and to have turkey sandwiches on tap 24/7. Disaaahster!
