Post a lie about the poster above.

[Dayvo]

AT's official name is Archiebald F'kall the fifth!

 

[TVC]

In his youth Dayvo had the words 'David's Lady Violator' tattooed on his manhood. Sadly with the inevitable failings of old age, it now mostly reads 'Dayvo', hence the name.

 

[Dayvo]

TVC always keeps an old iron handy, just in case he needs to pull.

 

[Archie_tect]

In the grander schem of things, Dayvo has an element of surprise in his kettle.

 

[TVC]

Archie loves Kinder Eggs - no surprise there then.

 

[Speicher]

The Velvet Curtain has a secret assignation this evening. He will be leading astray a young lady with a white dog.

 

[Archie_tect]

Speicher has spent the last 20 minutes brushing her English Bull terrier, Brucephalous, with mid tan Cherry Blossom boot polish. it's not going well as he refuses to stand on the newspaper. Can anyone advise how to remove boot polish from light blue cotton?

 

[TVC]

The statement above is just a smokescreen because Archie really does want to know how to get polish out of light blue cotton. He needs to get an answer fast before Mrs Tect gets home and wants to know what he's been doing with her PJs.

 

[Mad Doug Biker]

TVC knows only too well about this diallema as he was once caught having sex with a Routemaster Bus whilst allegedly sleepwalking.

What this has to do with boot polish, TVC wants to keep those in the know hushed up at pain of death for anyone who ever reveals the truth.

 

[twentysix by twentyfive]

MDB is jealous of all this boot polish activity as he is under doctor's orders to remove it from his diet. To this day he still has withdrawal symptoms and goes through the motions of spreading it on his morning toast.

 

[Theseus]

26x25 has a glass of wine for his morning toast

 

[oliglynn]

Touche has a false nose made out of cheese

 

[Kestevan]

Ologlynn has a toupe woven from nasal hair

 

[Archie_tect]

Kestevan has negotiated several suppliers- the best being the silken nasal fur of the Shetland Mountain Haggis farmed under license by Dayvo on the upper slopes of the Trondheim Cut.

 

[swee'pea99]

Archie tect once lost a rash bet and as a forfeit had to shave off the left half of his moustache. He quickly became accustomed to 'the new look', and has retained it, feeling (correctly) that it gives him a distinctive appearance, and (erroneously) that it is one of raffish intrigue (as distinct from, say, mental problems).