Sod's (Cycling) laws

[Unkraut]

The type of valve on your tyres is the only one that does not fit your new pump with pressure guage you just bought on offer.

 

[trustysteed]

If your bike falls over, it will land butter side down.

 

[gary r]

if you clean your bike it will rain for 40 days!

 

[Big Bren]

Traffic lights are specially calibrated to change to green at the sound of a cleat being unclipped.

Bren

 

[HLaB]

When you've got an injury/ illness its always sunny; when you're fit it pours again

 

[ChrisKH]

The public toilets you had 'positioned' half-way through a hundred miler will:-

a) always be locked, or

be out of loo paper, or

c) be open but the cubicles will be closed because of vandalism.

 

[Unkraut]

or d) vandals will have turned the loos into an 'open plan' environment.

 

[Bigtallfatbloke]

the only shop in the village on 'bleak moor' shall not stock energy drinks.

 

[HLaB]

the only shop in the village on 'bleak moor' shall not stock energy drinks.

or the only shop in the village closed down last week

 

[bazzadigz C+]

When you decide to tube it cos your feeling lazy the Central Line breaks down AND you have to walk 4 stations as complete mayhem has broken loose! (I wonder what mode of transport I used yesterday)

AND

When theres a tube strike one bike is at the LBS and the only one you have left decides to have a sulk and develops a major fault! so you go home and fix it for the following day, and guess what??!? the tube strike has been called off!

 

[Gasman]

Morrison's corollary to Sod's Law.

Where a choice of routes exists between two points, the number of stoppages and delays encountered on any route is inversely proportional to its length.

 

[Pete]

The person 'dropped' on a group ride is the one person who doesn't know the route.

Conversely, if you know the route perfectly and get 'dropped', you can guarantee that there will be someone waiting for you at the next junction.

[both of these things have actually happened to yours truly...]

 

[Bigtallfatbloke]

99% of drivers are reasonable idiots...but the one closest to you will be a homicidal maniac

 

[Elmer Fudd]

or the only shop in the village closed down last week

Or the only shop in the village is a local shop for local people

 

[got-to-get-fit]

the only shop in the village on 'bleak moor' shall not stock energy drinks.

and shall be staffed by Edward and Tubbs .....are you local?