Squashed gentlemens veg

[hoski]

I don't know if I'm unique in this but when I cycle my testes just disappear up into the lower part of my abdomen and drop down again when I jump off the bike. It's not uncomfortable at all and if they don't descend, gentle downwards pressure on the pubic area with the fingertips helps them slip back.

Even on hot days? I get that when it's a little crisp in the morning and I'm underdressed...

 

[funnkkymonkey]

Maybe if I lasso them and tie them off around my neck that might keep my love spuds out of harms way
everything is absolutely fine without the padding...saddle is a spesh that came with the bike and is pretty comfy...i've tried tilting it forward aswell to take the pressure off but still end up with sore plumbs...looks like i'll have to have a bit of a fiddle and try to get comfy...wish all problem solving was as much fun
cheers for all your comments...you lot make me laugh

 

[fossyant]

No1. Half decent cycle shorts, not Aldi etc. as the pad is a bit in the wrong place.

Do not tuck your wobbly bits in, make sure they are no where near your middle of leg area.

Saddles, less is more - less padding, narrower front, pelvis/sit bones in contact with saddle. Big wide saddles will mash anyone's soft bits.

You lot are soft pansies. Been riding following two nasty surgeries on lefty and still keep going... righty ain't too well either... Grrrr right saddle and some good shorts. You don't need Assos !!

 

[fossyant]

I wish mine would 'retract' - before the second surgery on 'leftie', I asked the consultant before... 'I am a bit concerned the surgery site will be resting on my saddle when riding' - him, no answer ??? Guess what, it hurted...lots... My recent injection into hurty bits is helping though - whoop.

 

[w00hoo_kent]

Maybe if I lasso them and tie them off around my neck that might keep my love spuds out of harms way
everything is absolutely fine without the padding...saddle is a spesh that came with the bike and is pretty comfy...i've tried tilting it forward aswell to take the pressure off but still end up with sore plumbs...looks like i'll have to have a bit of a fiddle and try to get comfy...wish all problem solving was as much fun
cheers for all your comments...you lot make me laugh

We know a song about that...

Do your balls hang low
Can you swing 'em too and fro
Can you tie 'em in a knot
Can you tie 'em in a bow

Do your balls hang low
Can you swing 'em too and fro
Can you tie 'em in a knot
Can you tie 'em in a bow
Can you swing 'em over your shoulder
Like a regimental soldier
Do your balls hang low

Do your balls hang low
Can you swing 'em too and fro
Can you tie 'em in a knot
Can you tie 'em in a bow
Do they make a lusty clamour
When you hit them with a hammer
Do your balls hang low

Do your balls hang low
Can you swing 'em too and fro
Can you tie 'em in a knot
Can you tie 'em in a bow
Do they make a hollow sound
When you drag 'em on the ground
Do your balls hang low

 

[Shut Up Legs]

'Gentlemen's veg', '3 items in my shopping trolley', 'nuts and bolts' - you guys are so funny. Someone should start a What do you call yours? thread.

When I had horses I always wondered what horse-riding gentlemen did with these items, but the gentlemen I consorted with at the time didn't ride horses so I had no one to ask.

Hey! It's important to keep Tom, Dick and Harry happy, don't you know!

 

[Cuchilo]

Seems odd to me that you are willing to spend out on other stuff but not on padded shorts Treat yourself and the boys to a very nice pair , you wont regret it !

 

[Gravity Aided]

Never had too much trouble with the McNuggets when riding. Mine only retract part way, as with the beloved Brewster Buffalo.

 

[cosmicbike]

We know a song about that...

Do your balls hang low
Can you swing 'em too and fro
Can you tie 'em in a knot
Can you tie 'em in a bow

Do your balls hang low
Can you swing 'em too and fro
Can you tie 'em in a knot
Can you tie 'em in a bow
Can you swing 'em over your shoulder
Like a regimental soldier
Do your balls hang low

Do your balls hang low
Can you swing 'em too and fro
Can you tie 'em in a knot
Can you tie 'em in a bow
Do they make a lusty clamour
When you hit them with a hammer
Do your balls hang low

Do your balls hang low
Can you swing 'em too and fro
Can you tie 'em in a knot
Can you tie 'em in a bow
Do they make a hollow sound
When you drag 'em on the ground
Do your balls hang low

Somewhat worryingly, my daughter has a Disney E-Aw donkey which sings that, but with 'ears' in the place of 'balls'...

 

[w00hoo_kent]

I heard the ears version (I think it's the original) on a children's TV program, probably Rosie & Jim or similar. Struck me as an odd one considering the bawdy version is pretty well known...

 

[funnkkymonkey]

Cuchilo...its because I've spent so much already that I don't really want to spend anymore on anything else for a while especially if I buy some shorts for £50-80 and they are no better for me its a complete waste of money... maybe I'll have to bite the bullet and try some one of these days but just not yet...I'll have a fiddle instead...

 

[Gravity Aided]

Does your hair hang low?

Does it wobble to and fro

can you tie it in a knot ?

can you tie it in a bow ?

can you toss it over your shoulder

like a contintental soldier

does your hair hang low ?


I think these are the original lyrics I heard, long before ears, balls, or boobs.

 

[Gravity Aided]

Cuchilo...its because I've spent so much already that I don't really want to spend anymore on anything else for a while especially if I buy some shorts for £50-80 and they are no better for me its a complete waste of money... maybe I'll have to bite the bullet and try some one of these days but just not yet...I'll have a fiddle instead...

Might try sewing a bit of old terry cloth into a pair of shorts. That would help some.