Table tennis bats

[Speicher]

I would like to buy two table tennis bats. This is so that when I go on holiday and there is a tennis table, I can play with a half decent bat, instead of the ones that are lying around the room at where ever I am staying. I could also get used to the same bat. (I used to play table tennis quite a lot).

So I thought I would look on Ebay to see if they have a few. They have approx three thousand of the things.

Some are a bit "fishy" in that the location of the item is not given, but the postage is very high for a comparatively lightweight item.

The brand name Dunlop keeps cropping up. Are all bats the same size in the handle? What sort of bat should I go for as an all-round bat, as it were, as opposed to one for competition level?

I am hoping someone on here knows about batty bats.
TIA

 

[Renard]

Speicher plays air guitar with table tennis bats.

 

[Aperitif]

I used to play all the time - for three years at Art School - about four hours a day
I used Stiga - big fat foam for smashing the ball around...Do they still make pimply bats without foam? It was great fun and I got quite good. I hope you are able to find something suitable for your needs.

 

[dellzeqq]

take a tip from me. There are bigger things to worry about in this world that table tennis bats. That sounds obvious, but the harsh truth is that there are people out there who do worry about table tennis bats. In fact, they worry about table tennis bats a lot. Far too much in my opinion. And this is why........

Back in the good old days table tennis bats were bits of ply with rubber on them. Some had no rubber. And along came a chap by the name of (iirc) Victor Barna. He put multiple layers of spongy stuff and stippled stuff, and before you know it, eastern Europeans, desperate to travel to the west, and a whole load of Chinese guys using penholder grips (don't go there) were imparting so much spin to the ball that it was leaving that bat at 100mph, travelling round the building, stopping at the Lamb and Flag for a pint of bitter and then landing on the opponents half of the table where it exploded into a million pieces, breaking out flags of all the nations in the world as it did so. Cue British disappointment at the table tennis championships - our boys and girls relied on the old bats, and their moustaches (although the girls didn't major in moustaches, some made the effort) and they got whupped every time.

That was the dark ages of table tennis. A bit like the wars between the Time Lords and the Daleks. The poor old Brits just stood there, clutching their travel sickness pills, and complaining about the food, while Johnny Foreigner went about his spinning business.

So, wherever you're going there will be some local bat, with a zillion little layers of rubber, rather like puff pastry but less edible, waiting for you. This will be perfectly adapted to local conditions, and, in the most advanced countries, it will enable you to spin the ball through 534.7 degrees while reading crime detective books.

Relax and enjoy........

 

[Speicher]

"Pimply bats without foam"? I don't recall that in any of the descriptions.

I would have thought the foam would deaden the speed of the ball. I do recall a little bit about the co-efficient of elasticity - steady at the back there!

 

[Bigtwin]

Cue British disappointment at the table tennis championships - our boys and girls relied on the old bats, and their moustaches (although the girls didn't major in moustaches, some made the effort) and they got whupped every time.

Apart from Fred Perry.

TT bats are the exact answer to cycling spending. So long as you both have about the same bats, the worse they are, the better.

Seriously. I have had a lot of excellent games with 1996 desk diary V's Blue Peter Annual 1974.

 

[accountantpete]

Didn't they used to have different pimples on each side of the bat to confuse johnny foreigner? Hardly cricket in my opinion.

 

[Speicher]

I tend to get a bit competitive in games, and would like to play properly.

After a week's practice I intend to take part in the the Veteran Ladies World Championships in Azerbaydzhanskaya. I will be instantly recognised due to my ressemblance to my paternal great grand mother.

I understand that Vodka is the prerequisite drink for celebrating any victory.

 

[dellzeqq]

Apart from Fred Perry.

TT bats are the exact answer to cycling spending. So long as you both have about the same bats, the worse they are, the better.

Seriously. I have had a lot of excellent games with 1996 desk diary V's Blue Peter Annual 1974.

And that, actually, is the truth of the matter. The crappier the bats the better the game.

 

[Aperitif]

*Ping* Chester Barnes Wallis - inventor of the bouncing ball...
*Pong* A TT player's armpit...

 

[dellzeqq]

I tend to get a bit competitive in games, and would like to play properly.

After a week's practice I intend to take part in the the Veteran Ladies World Championships in Azerbaydzhanskaya. I will be instantly recognised due to my ressemblance to my paternal great grand mother.

I understand that Vodka is the prerequisite drink for celebrating any victory.

I hate to be the one to tell you this, but the judges in Azerbaydzhanskaya are as crooked as can be - you stand no chance unless you're two metres tall, equipped with tits like zepellins, and you're willing to sleep with every man (and woman) jack of them. And, even then the head judges granddaughter will get the cup.

 

[Speicher]

That settles it then, I will just go to Devon instead.

 

[Bigtwin]

I hate to be the one to tell you this, but the judges in Azerbaydzhanskaya are as crooked as can be - you stand no chance unless you're two metres tall, equipped with tits like zepellins, and you're willing to sleep with every man (and woman) jack of them. And, even then the head judges granddaughter will get the cup.

Bollox. I was runner up in '86 and took the knock out service Cup, and at best, mine are no more than Goodyear Blimps.

 

[Speicher]

Yes, but the version I heard was that you misunderstood the meaning of Knock Out, in that you applied the Royal Version of it.

I have not heard of them being called blimps either!

 

[dellzeqq]

Bollox. I was runner up in '86 and took the knock out service Cup, and at best, mine are no more than Goodyear Blimps.

This post is rubbish without pics!