Tale of a BMW driver

[User482]

It's amusing that people may choose a 3-series as a sign that they've "made it". They're now more common than a Ford Mondeo. And if you believe the motoring press, not really any better either.

 

[terry huckle]

User482

I don`t believe it. Both my 3 series BMWs (318i and 320d) are superb....well designed, built with a great deal of care, and so far, utterly reliable. They are a joy to drive....the only downside is the poor attempt at humour displayed by some of the f***kwits in the world who can`t afford one. Poor driving is sometimes sadly displayed by people behind the steering wheels of BMWs....I`d confiscate them if it were down to me....but it`s not exclusive to drivers of that marque. I`d have the b****r who nearly killed me in a Nissan Qashquai today strung up.

 

[Smeggers]

poor attempt at humour displayed by some of the f***kwits in the world who can`t afford one.

You can take the man out of a BMW, but you cant take the BMW out of Terry Huckle.

 

[arranandy]

TALE OF A BMW DRIVER
The other day I was cruising along as usual coming onto one of my motorways, which was very busy with inferior cars.
First off, I couldn't Believe that the volume of traffic DIDN'T slow down for me AT ALL as I came off the slip road! I had to squeeze into a barely big enough gap between two cars in order to get onto my motorway (the driver of the car behind me did realise his mistake though and honked an apology to me with a long blast of his horn.)!
Unbelievably, I had to do the same again before I could get to the BMW lane (why do underlings use this lane? Surely everyone knows it is for BMW drivers only?).
Anyway, once I was in the BMW lane and posing along at 176 km/h enjoying the adulation that the inferior car drivers were giving me, I noticed an inferior car ahead of me which was not only in the BMW lane of my motorway, but was driving at a ridiculous 120 km/h. Naturally, I got to within a foot or so of his rear bumper and flashed my headlights to remind him he shouldn't be in the BMW lane of my motorway and to get out of my way.
Of course, once he realised it was a BMW behind him, he did just that, but I could hardly believe it when he pulled straight back out behind me! He also tried to keep up with me and when he realised I would out-run him, he put on some blue lights in his front grill and urged me to get onto the hard shoulder so that he could congratulate me on my excellent car.
Needless to say, I was eager oblige and when we had stopped, the man gave me a piece of paper confirming what I already knew - that my car goes fast! Apparently he wants everyone to know what a superior car I have, so I had to go to court and show them. The man also said if I carried on like this they would take my drivers licence away! Can you imagine no need for a drivers licence?
See, now THAT's the sort of respect you get when you buy and drive a BMW!



(Shamelessly copied off orsm.net)

I find that I have similar problems when I'm driving my Audi

 

[yenrod]

Patrick, I thought the 'drugdealer' only frequents the Desside / Queensferry area of 'North-Wales'

In North Wales (and in particularly on the coast) the BMW is the car of choice for the lower grade drug dealers. As they progress, they acquire Porsches and Bentleys. When John Gizzi got a Bentley the police fitted it free of charge with a recording device.

 

[Globalti]

A colleague of mine actually resigned last summer because the company refused to give him a beemer for his drive. He battled with them for 12 years and eventually left for a company who would. He was a cock when he worked with us, he drove his A4 like an idiot and constantly boasted about thrashing it to death. I shudder to think what he's like now he's got the beemer he always wanted.

 

[girofan]

User482

I don`t believe it. Both my 3 series BMWs (318i and 320d) are superb....well designed, built with a great deal of care, and so far, utterly reliable. They are a joy to drive....the only downside is the poor attempt at humour displayed by some of the f***kwits in the world who can`t afford one. Poor driving is sometimes sadly displayed by people behind the steering wheels of BMWs....I`d confiscate them if it were down to me....but it`s not exclusive to drivers of that marque. I`d have the b****r who nearly killed me in a Nissan Qashquai today strung up.

I could afford three, but I don't wish to be ostracised by intelligent people!
It's not the marque. It's the pillocks Beemers attract.

 

[Cab]

What I don't get is why they're not built with indicators. I mean, if the BMW is somehow a 'quality' vehicle, you'd think they'd have them.

 

[snorri]

This word beemer has led me in to some odd conversations at times. To me, this is a typical beamer......http://www.geocities.com/TheTropics/Shores/9590/208.htm

 

[Andy in Sig]

It's funny but in the land of the BMW's birth the worst driven cars seem to be Audis and Mercs followed by any souped up hatchback driven by a prat wearing a baseball hat.

(I've got a BMW by the way but it is 8 yrs old if that is any mitigation.)

 

[stephec]

I could afford three, but I don't wish to be ostracised by intelligent people!
It's not the marque. It's the pillocks Beemers attract.

Or even worse, the pillocks who 'aspire' to own one.

 

[Cycling Naturalist]

Patrick, I thought the 'drugdealer' only frequents the Desside / Queensferry area of 'North-Wales'

We've now got more than one drug dealer.

 

[terry huckle]

Girofan:

I`m actually about to acquire a 3rd, but that`ll be a hobby car....it`s 12 years old, just needs a bit of TLC ,a classic in a few years time.

I actually agree that more than a few pillocks end up behind the steering wheels of BMWs.....I would argue that a disproportionately high number of those vehicles are company cars not therefore mostly driven by discerning motorists.

I`m not sure that people who ostracise BMW drivers are necessarily intelligent....they`re certainly not intelligent enough to recognise a superior product . And with the tired old remarks made, they`re not very witty or funny either....just sad little lemmings.

 

[Sh4rkyBloke]

Possibly a superior product... most generally driven by inferior pricks. This may well be down to the fact that many are company cars, the fact still remains though (IME).

Hmmm, what does this say about my intelligence though...