Tea? (Part 1)

[Chuffy]

You're best off ignoring chuffy, kristy. He's one of these postmodern 'new men' who can get a bit suffocating and bewildering.

He tends to indulge people in a obsequious way that sometimes feels like a a week long fragrant and oily foot massage.

Oh dear. It's like those mistreated puppies who don't know how to react when someone shows them kindness instead of a sharped boot.

Don't worry Abitrary. We will teach you to accept kindness.

 

[TheDoctor]

*sharpens boots in readiness*

Shall I get the kettle on in the meantime?

 

[Chuffy]

*sharpens boots in readiness*

Shall I get the kettle on in the meantime?

NO! Pouring boiling water over helpless Abitrarys is *wrong*.

Make him a nice cup of tea instead. Weak and milky in case he gets over stimulated.

 

[Landslide]

Sod the kettle, I've moved on to the whisky...

 

[Chuffy]

Sod the kettle, I've moved on to the whisky...

Everyone needs a hobby.

 

[Night Train]

Roll up your left trouser leg, expose your breast, clasp the Sacred Digestive of McVitie and recite after me:

Now where was I when Arch, Speicher, etc were doing this?

 

[Chuffy]

Now where was I when Arch, Speicher, etc were doing this?

Arch and Speicher are ladies?

Oooooooooo, me sacred chasubles, I feel all overcome.

 

[Abitrary]

oh, my word...

 

[Night Train]

Arch and Speicher are ladies?

Oooooooooo, me sacred chasubles, I feel all overcome.

Well, you must have noticed when they lifted their trouser leg and exposed a shaved lower limb. Then again, this is a cycling forum, shaved limbs are two a penny just among the men!

 

[TheDoctor]

That reminds me, NT. I've run out of Veet.

 

[Chuffy]

That reminds me, NT. I've run out of Veet.

Poking through your string vest again is it?

 

[TheDoctor]

Have you been looking in my bedroom again?

 

[Chuffy]

Have you been looking in my bedroom again?

<twitch>

 

[Night Train]

That reminds me, NT. I've run out of Veet.

Veet is old hat, I hear this stuff is what the decerning body hair removers use. Stops razor bumps in delicate areas, apparently.

 

[TheDoctor]

Hmmm.Magic Shave is the razorless hair removal system for black men
Do black guys have different facial hair to pink people?
I might get some and give it a go.