Tea?

[Blue]

Owdo

Sorry to read you've problems, and hope they sort themselves out. Or can be sorted out.

You couldn't drive a different, longer way there and say it's similar to the other one, could you?

That may be said in jest but I could probably get away with it, such in the lack of awareness and confusion that dementia brings. The two properties aren't too far away from each other as the crow flies but the areas are different because one is just inside the towns' ring road and the other is just outside said ring road.

I like to involve Mrs B and 'bring her along' with every choice and decision but I do sometimes wonder if I should as it makes everything harder for me and is lost on her. Indeed, even Mrs B often says I should just make the decisions and tell her what's going to happen - she's all too aware of her dementia. Somehow, that just doesn't seem right to me as I think that may be taking away her basic rights as a person in a marriage of equals. I don't know if I'm right, or just making things more difficult than they could be. I fight the dementia every day on her behalf because she is no longer able to do it herself. Having said all that, if I think this alternative bungalow is a prospect I'll persuade her that that's the case and I know she'll go along with me because I'm aware that deep down she knows I have her best interests at heart.

We'll see what tomorrows viewing and another chat with the estate agent brings. The place has the advantage of being empty so I may be permitted to send in contractors to plan & price the refurb so that we can get that done quickly if and when we move in.

There are endless possibilities which are interesting but a bit stressful. The stress is probably just made bad by the underlying complication of the dementia. Ah well, the end result, whatever it is, will improve our lives so it'll be worth it. I'm maintaining focus on the end game.

 

[classic33]

That may be said in jest but I could probably get away with it, such in the lack of awareness and confusion that dementia brings. The two properties aren't too far away from each other as the crow flies but the areas are different because one is just inside the towns' ring road and the other is just outside said ring road.

I like to involve Mrs B and 'bring her along' with every choice and decision but I do sometimes wonder if I should as it makes everything harder for me and is lost on her. Indeed, even Mrs B often says I should just make the decisions and tell her what's going to happen - she's all too aware of her dementia. Somehow, that just doesn't seem right to me as I think that may be taking away her basic rights as a person in a marriage of equals. I don't know if I'm right, or just making things more difficult than they could be. I fight the dementia every day on her behalf because she is no longer able to do it herself. Having said all that, if I think this alternative bungalow is a prospect I'll persuade her that that's the case and I know she'll go along with me because I'm aware that deep down she knows I have her best interests at heart.

We'll see what tomorrows viewing and another chat with the estate agent brings. The place has the advantage of being empty so I may be permitted to send in contractors to plan & price the refurb so that we can get that done quickly if and when we move in.

There are endless possibilities which are interesting but a bit stressful. The stress is probably just made bad by the underlying complication of the dementia. Ah well, the end result, whatever it is, will improve our lives so it'll be worth it. I'm maintaining focus on the end game.

Said in jest, many just switch off in a car if not driving, totally oblivious to what they're passing, just the the time spent travelling.

No offence intended, you've enough on your plate at present.

 

[Blue]

Said in jest, many just switch off in a car if not driving, totally oblivious to what they're passing, just the the time spent travelling.

No offence intended, you've enough on your plate at present.

No worries - I didn’t even think of ‘offence’ being an issue so none taken my friend

I find writing my long posts useful as I no longer have Mrs B to discuss things with me - her ability to hold a ‘discussion’ has long gone.

 

[classic33]

No worries - I didn’t even think of ‘offence’ being an issue so none taken my friend

I find writing my long posts useful as I no longer have Mrs B to discuss things with me - her ability to hold a ‘discussion’ has long gone.

Sorry to see that last part.

Total ignorance on my part with this one.
When you say ability to hold a discussion, is this due to not remembering what was said and being able to give an answer.

 

[Blue]

Sorry to see that last part.

Total ignorance on my part with this one.
When you say ability to hold a discussion, is this due to not remembering what was said and being able to give an answer.

It's a mixture of things. she can't follow a conversation from the points of remembering what is being said as the conversation as it goes along or comprehending what is being said as she listens. Due to this she will switch off and so not even hear what is being said - which leads to I told you to do this, find that there types of frustrating scenes. Added to that is her loss of vocabulary so she can't reply or say what she wants most of the time. It's all very difficult and frustrating for both of us but it must be dreadful for her as she is a person who was 2/3 way through an OU degree just 2-3 years ago.

Some people with dementia are unaware of their condition but my wife is 100% aware and that must make it hell for her.

 

[classic33]

It's a mixture of things. she can't follow a conversation from the points of remembering what is being said as the conversation as it goes along or comprehending what is being said as she listens. Due to this she will switch off and so not even hear what is being said - which leads to @I told you to do this, find that there types of frustrating scenes. Added to that is her loss of vocabulary so she can't reply or say what she wants most of the time. It's all very difficult and frustrating for both of us but it must be dreadful for her as she is a person who was 2/3 way through an OU degree just 2-3 years ago.

Some people with dementia are unaware of their condition but my wife is 100% aware and that must make it hell for her.

The brain has the question/answer but the mouth can't deliver it?

Over simplified, but if that's the case I can sympathize with it. They wanted to remove the part responsible for all that, I said no chance or words to that effect.

I like the way you say she is a person rather than a dementia sufferer. The human element has been there, first, throughout with you.

 

[Bobby Mhor]

I hope that continues Bobby

Even did a couple of short climbs today of just over 6%...

One of my nephews is already getting excited about the prospect of Pres Biden visiting the place of his Irish roots as it's not far from where he lives - if the day comes I may even go down for a family visit as he's never met Mrs B.

This is seriously nuts..
Some of the high jinks going behind the scenes, the smears, the tweets amongst many other things you would have expected not to come form the land of the Free and the Brave. It's feckin nuts.
If the incumbent gets back in?
Uncle Joe looks the best option..
I've kept a closer than usual eye on the lead up and proceedings and have a smile as the word 'Socialism' is the bogey man to which all the US panics...
If Drumf gets in, I think it is more than chlorinated chicken we have to worry about.
Sorry for the politics, folks..

That's something I miss these days as I used to spend a lot of time in the mountains. We junked most of our gear when we decluttered last spring and I felt sad when we did that.

I've activated(radio ham is other hobby) hills (Marilyns) in Scotland, Wales and England and had planned maybe a quick visit to 'do' one the Mournes and maybe one in the South but all plans headed out the window, maybe in 2021 0r 22 or 23 or 24

I'd got near a spot I normally stop and give a call out on my radio, a white estate with foreign number plates came screaming towards me, wide road thankfully.
Seconds later, screeching and a crump..
I looked to see but just saw it heading away so wonder what it hit, will see next time round, looney.

 

[Blue]

I used to know the Mournes like the back of my hand and did a lot of fell running as well as climbing and walking there. Indeed, Mrs B and myself got engaged on top of Slieve Commedagh. I used to carry my son in a baby carrier on my back when he was a toddler and when he was 3 and able to climb a little I picked the easiest named hill I could think of and escorted him to the top. He was so pleased with himself when he got to the top of 'Butter Mountain' under his own steam - and he's gone camping and climbing through the Mournes many times since.

 

[Blue]

The brain has the question/answer but the mouth can't deliver it?

Over simplified, but if that's the case I can sympathize with it. They wanted to remove the part responsible for all that, I said no chance or words to that effect.

I like the way you say she is a person rather than a dementia sufferer. The human element has been there, first, throughout with you.

I would agree with you - if I could still manage I wouldn't volunteer the removal of anything.

The highlighted bit is something many people who care for a loved one with dementia don't understand and I used to point the issue out when I worked on the dementia forum.

Dementia itself isn't a disease as such. The word dementia refers to a syndrome that covers the behaviours and symptoms exhibited by a person suffering from any one of dozens of conditions(although Alzheimer's disease causes about 2/3rds of dementias). A person with dementia is still the same person they always were but they can lose skills like cognition or language and also get buried under the symptoms with no way to express themselves. However, they are still in there and with a bit of thought can often be reached. This inability to express oneself can often result in what is seen as aggression but is just a result of the person getting frustrated. Examples may be that they are in pain or think they are being threatened in some way and the only way they can express themselves and defend themselves is to scream and/or lash out. This is where, even with professionals, a chemical cosh may be used to keep someone quiet.

This is all part of why I want this house move. As you, yourself, have said, no-one knows Mrs B better than me so I can usually know what she wants or what is bothering her when she can't express herself. I want to be in a bungalow for the ease of mobility and in a place bigger than the apartment so that we can have room to work and install equipment when required(and we are more likely than not to be in that position in the future).

Having said all that, Mrs B is still in a good place and anyone just saying hello in the street wouldn't yet detect anything being amiss. That's the reason I'm in a hurry to move as dementia doesn't wait and I want to move at a time when it is still likely to go fairly smoothly.

I find it useful to pour out my thoughts in these posts but I do sometimes worry that you are all fed up reading them!

 

[classic33]

I would agree with you - if I could still manage I wouldn't volunteer the removal of anything.

The highlighted bit is something many people who care for a loved one with dementia don't understand and I used to point the issue out when I worked on the dementia forum.

Dementia itself isn't a disease as such. The word dementia refers to a syndrome that covers the behaviours and symptoms exhibited by a person suffering from any one of dozens of conditions(although Alzheimer's disease causes about 2/3rds of dementias). A person with dementia is still the same person they always were but they can lose skills like cognition or language and also get buried under the symptoms with no way to express themselves. However, they are still in there and with a bit of thought can often be reached. This inability to express oneself can often result in what is seen as aggression but is just a result of the person getting frustrated. Examples may be that they are in pain or think they are being threatened in some way and the only way they can express themselves and defend themselves is to scream and/or lash out. This is where, even with professionals, a chemical cosh may be used to keep someone quiet.

This is all part of why I want this house move. As you, yourself, have said, no-one knows Mrs B better than me so I can usually know what she wants or what is bothering her when she can't express herself. I want to be in a bungalow for the ease of mobility and in a place bigger than the apartment so that we can have room to work and install equipment when required(and we are more likely than not to be in that position in the future).

Having said all that, Mrs B is still in a good place and anyone just saying hello in the street wouldn't yet detect anything being amiss. That's the reason I'm in a hurry to move as dementia doesn't wait and I want to move at a time when it is still likely to go fairly smoothly.

I find it useful to pour out my thoughts in these posts but I do sometimes worry that you are all fed up reading them!

If I were fed up reading them, would I be asking?

Under normal circumstances a house move wouldn't be as simple as it sounds. This year has been anything but normal, for everyone. Trying to do something as easily as you could last year isn't possible. Can't have helped your situation in recent weeks either.

They weren't certain it wasn't working right, but I've since met a few who've had it done and glad I stuck to my guns on it.

Search for George H. hippocampus, if you get the time. You'll be "tooling up" for another nighttime visit I assume.

 

[classic33]

Even did a couple of short climbs today of just over 6%...

This is seriously nuts..
Some of the high jinks going behind the scenes, the smears, the tweets amongst many other things you would have expected not to come form the land of the Free and the Brave. It's feckin nuts.
If the incumbent gets back in?
Uncle Joe looks the best option..
I've kept a closer than usual eye on the lead up and proceedings and have a smile as the word 'Socialism' is the bogey man to which all the US panics...
If Drumf gets in, I think it is more than chlorinated chicken we have to worry about.
Sorry for the politics, folks..

I've activated(radio ham is other hobby) hills (Marilyns) in Scotland, Wales and England and had planned maybe a quick visit to 'do' one the Mournes and maybe one in the South but all plans headed out the window, maybe in 2021 0r 22 or 23 or 24

I'd got near a spot I normally stop and give a call out on my radio, a white estate with foreign number plates came screaming towards me, wide road thankfully.
Seconds later, screeching and a crump..
I looked to see but just saw it heading away so wonder what it hit, will see next time round, looney.

You'll be standing by on the ole radio, ready to forward the success to the nation?

 

[Bobby Mhor]

You'll be standing by on the ole radio, ready to forward the success to the nation?

..
I'll be snoring at the first declarations.
It's hard to evaluate it all, I thought our press and media were biased (BBC Scotland looking at you)
Basically, depends on who they support on what they publish..
two party systems don't work...
I did make FN03go just before 5 though....

 

[classic33]

..
I'll be snoring at the first declarations.
It's hard to evaluate it all, I thought our press and media were biased (BBC Scotland looking at you)
Basically, depends on who they support on what they publish..
two party systems don't work...
I did make FN03go just before 5 though....

Toronto...

 

[Bobby Mhor]

Toronto...

Was trying to avoid the Vuelta time trial result so I can watch it later..
must stop visiting BBC Sport

 

[classic33]

Was trying to avoid the Vuelta time trial result so I can watch it later..
must stop visiting BBC Sport

Avert your gaze/eyes and keep the headset on.