Tesco scam

Discussion in 'CycleChat Cafe' started by Fnaar, 24 Jan 2008.

  1. Fnaar

    Fnaar Smutmaster General

    TESCO Scam
    Be careful
    A 'heads up' for you and any of your friends who may be regular customers at Tesco.
    Over the last month I became the victim of a clever scam whilst out shopping. Simply going out to get some bits and bobs has turned out to be quite traumatic. Don't be naive enough to think it couldn't happen to you! Here's how the scam works: Two seriously good looking 18 or 19 year old girls come over to your car as you are loading your stuff into the boot. They both start wiping your windshield with a rag and Windowlene, with their cleavage almost falling out of their skimpy T-shirts. It is impossible not to look. When you thank them and offer them a tip, they say 'No' and instead ask you for a lift to another shopping centre. You agree and they get in the back seat. On the way, they start having sex with each other. Then one of them climbs over into the front seat and performs oral sex on you, while the other one steals your wallet. I had my wallet stolen on December 4th, 9th, 10th, twice on the 15th, 17th, 20th, three times just yesterday, and very likely again this upcoming weekend as soon as I can buy some more wallets. Please pass this message on to all the men you know to warn them about this scam.
  2. Chuffy

    Chuffy Veteran

    Ahhh, it's like welcoming an old, old friend. :biggrin:

    There's two nuns in the bath.
    Nun1 - Where's the soap?
    Nun2 - Yes it does, doesn't it.

  3. Slim

    Slim Über Member

    Plough Lane
    Not sure how old this one is....

    A man is stumbling through the woods, totally drunk, when he comes upon a preacher baptizing people in the river. He proceeds to walk into the water and subsequently bumps into the preacher. The preacher turns around and is almost overcome by the smell of alcohol, whereupon he asks the drunk, "Are you ready to find Jesus?"

    The drunk answers, "Yes, I am."

    So the preacher grabs him and dunks him in the water. He pulls him up and asks the drunk, "Brother have you found Jesus?"

    The drunk replies, "No, I haven't found Jesus."

    The preacher shocked at the answer, dunks him into the water again for a little longer. He again pulls him out of the water and asks again, "Have you found Jesus my brother?"

    The drunk again answers, "No, I haven't found Jesus."

    By this time the preacher is at his wits end and dunks the drunk in the water again --- but this time holds him down for about 30 seconds and when he begins kicking his arms and legs he pulls him up. The preacher again asks the drunk, "For the love of God have you found Jesus?"

    The drunk wipes his eyes and catches his breath and asks the preacher, "Are you sure this is where he fell in?"
  4. magnatom

    magnatom Guest

    You've gone back and re-read the old thread haven't you :biggrin:
  5. Pete

    Pete Guest

  6. Chuffy

    Chuffy Veteran

    I didn't need to!
  7. OP

    Fnaar Smutmaster General

  8. Chuffy

    Chuffy Veteran

    And here too! :biggrin:
    Don't be embarrased Fnarr, you're doing a fine job keeping a fine old joke running and operational. The nation thanks you. :biggrin:
  9. Thanks Fnarr. I'm so tired, I didn't see the punchline coming. Best laugh of an otherwise desolate day!

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