The Football.....

[Smokin Joe]

The way they all over-pronounce the names of foreign players does my head in, why is anyone named Dave who doesn't come from the British Isles called "Davvid", why is Ralph Coates's distant relative Sebastian's surname pronounced Ko-art-ezz, and why is Man Utd's Tony Martial pronounced "Marsh-ee-al", are people from Mars called "Marsh-ee-ans"?

I bet they had some serious discussions when Kuntz played for Germany. No way they'd want Jack Charlton in the studio for those games.

 

[SpokeyDokey]

More rants:

Martin Tyler is just plain despicable but appears to be highly rated in some quarters.

He absolutely loathes Chelsea and Manchester United and that ripples through his lop-sided and at times disgracefully biased commentary.

On the flipside he practically orgasms whenever Liverpool score.

***

Michael Owen - just bugger off and play with your horses and never assault my ears with that voice again.

***

Andy Townsend - where's my gun? Inane to the point of absurdity - complete waste of a skin.

***

Gary Lineker - tries very hard to be funny but he isn't. Media whore par-excellence. Better off sticking to crisp selling.

***

Thierry Henry - comatose, could play a lead role in the Living Dead with even less effort than he puts into his punditry.

***

I feel better now.

 

[AndyRM]

Yup. Most of the time it's bollocks but I once sat in front of a manager and his assistant at a pre-season warm-up and I learned a lot. Very interesting it was - particularly in regard to players' positioning when they don't have the ball.

It's the same with fans who only watch games on television. You can only see a few players on screen at a time so how on earth can you be expected to read the whole of the game properly?

 

[SpokeyDokey]

He is useless.

We should have the option of watching the game without commentary. I know you can mute the sound but that destroys the atmosphere. When you watch at the ground the lack of inane babble from a commentator isn't an issue.

Watched Chelsea either last season or season before last (probably before last because we beat whoever we were playing ) on a Dutch stream and it was exactly that - no babbling and just the crowd noise.

Brilliant - Lovely Wife (serious football expert) & I provided our own naturally unbiased and deeply profound insights.

 

[AndyRM]

More rants:

Martin Tyler is just plain despicable but appears to be highly rated in some quarters.

He absolutely loathes Chelsea and Manchester United and that ripples through his lop-sided and at times disgracefully biased commentary.

On the flipside he practically orgasms whenever Liverpool score.

***

Michael Owen - just bugger off and play with your horses and never assault my ears with that voice again.

***

Andy Townsend - where's my gun? Inane to the point of absurdity - complete waste of a skin.

***

Gary Lineker - tries very hard to be funny but he isn't. Media whore par-excellence. Better off sticking to crisp selling.

***

Thierry Henry - comatose, could play a lead role in the Living Dead with even less effort than he puts into his punditry.

***

I feel better now.

Sshh.

 

[SpokeyDokey]

It's the same with fans who only watch games on television. You can only see a few players on screen at a time so how on earth can you be expected to read the whole of the game properly?

Yes, a very different experience.

I'm waiting for Holographic TV to be invented. Be great to see the match spread out across the lounge floor. Even better if it was interactive so as I could give the lazy buggers a good tonking when they take their collective foot off the gas after going one up (Chelsea speciality I'm afraid).

 

[AndyRM]

Yes, a very different experience.

I'm waiting for Holographic TV to be invented. Be great to see the match spread out across the lounge floor. Even better if it was interactive so as I could give the lazy buggers a good tonking when they take their collective foot off the gas after going one up (Chelsea speciality I'm afraid).

If they can bring back 2Pac and Michael Jackson that must be on the cards!

 

[SpokeyDokey]

Whilst I'm at it...

What's with these people who spend all year denigrating my love of the Beautiful Game and casting aspersions on my intelligence because I watch "22 grown men kick a bag of air around", who suddenly become overnight bleedin' football experts whenever England play in a major competition?

Fries my brain.

 

[mark st1]

Sshh.

Owen one of the worst ever ! Up there with Nobby Savage he needs an iron bar in the face.

I do cut Owen a bit of slack though


View: https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=jhcXWWBDOZY

 

[AndyRM]

Whilst I'm at it...

What's with these people who spend all year denigrating my love of the Beautiful Game and casting aspersions on my intelligence because I watch "22 grown men kick a bag of air around", who suddenly become overnight bleedin' football experts whenever England play in a major competition?

Fries my brain.

There's a guy like that at work. When the hype around this tournament started he started ripping it out of me because Scotland hadn't qualified.

I endured this for a couple of days before it became tedious so I asked him to name who he'd have first on England's teamsheet.

Without even pausing to think he said,

"Gareth Bale"

He's not been quite as vocal about football recently.

 

[SpokeyDokey]

There's a guy like that at work. When the hype around this tournament started he started ripping it out of me because Scotland hadn't qualified.

I endured this for a couple of days before it became tedious so I asked him to name who he'd have first on England's teamsheet.

Without even pausing to think he said,

"Gareth Bale"

He's not been quite as vocal about football recently.

Shame he wasn't correct though - esp' as Harry looked away with the fairies last night.

 

[Piemaster]

More rants:

Martin Tyler is just plain despicable but appears to be highly rated in some quarters.

He absolutely loathes Chelsea and Manchester United and that ripples through his lop-sided and at times disgracefully biased commentary.

On the flipside he practically orgasms whenever Liverpool score.

***

Michael Owen - just bugger off and play with your horses and never assault my ears with that voice again.

***

Andy Townsend - where's my gun? Inane to the point of absurdity - complete waste of a skin.

***

Gary Lineker - tries very hard to be funny but he isn't. Media whore par-excellence. Better off sticking to crisp selling.

***

Thierry Henry - comatose, could play a lead role in the Living Dead with even less effort than he puts into his punditry.

***

I feel better now.

Your list is wrong, as in incomplete. You missed out Lawrenson. He shouldn't be allowed anywhere near a microphone thats plugged in during the course of a match.
Most footballers seem incapable of making any sort of sense immediately after a match, questions often answered with "y'know". They need time to process the questions and read the script - they can interview a lot better in a studio type atmosphere. Lawrenson is exactly the same, except he shouldn't be allowed in a studio either.

 

[Joey Shabadoo]

You Englishes are lucky. You don't have Derek "Ah'm urny" Ferguson. He's like a particularly slow child reading out match reports he clearly hasn't written

 

[AndyRM]

Your list is wrong, as in incomplete. You missed out Lawrenson. He shouldn't be allowed anywhere near a microphone thats plugged in during the course of a match.
Most footballers seem incapable of making any sort of sense immediately after a match, questions often answered with "y'know". They need time to process the questions and read the script - they can interview a lot better in a studio type atmosphere. Lawrenson is exactly the same, except he shouldn't be allowed in a studio either.

Neil Lennon has been omitted too, the man is a total fud.

I will always be happy that Killie played a part in denying Celtic's treble in 2012.

 

[Smokin Joe]

It surprises me the number of players who reached a high professional level and seem to have little understanding of the game. Talent and insight do not always go together, witnessed by the number of ex pros who are a disaster as managers.

On another topic, Associated Press are reporting that England and Russia have been threatened with expulsion from the tournament if there is any repeat of the violence by their fans.