The Retirement Thread
- Thread starter Dirk
- Start date
Page may contain affiliate links. Please see terms for details.
PaulSB
Squire
- Location
- Chorley, Lancashire
Silver tongued fox isn't he....................Flatterer
Flick of the Elbow
less than
- Location
- Pentlands Midlothian Edinburgh
Good morning all, a touch of frost here but not much.
welsh dragon
Thanks but no thanks. I think I'll pass.
welsh dragon
Thanks but no thanks. I think I'll pass.
Mo1959
Legendary Member
- Location
- Perthshire,Scotland
That was a chilly 5 miles. Supposed to get milder but turn to rain by lunchtime. Tomorrow looks much milder thankfully. I did a little extra loop around the graveyard when I finished my normal walk and met a neighbour with her two collies and noticed one of these balls with a rope just after that so lifted it and took it along to see if it belonged to them which it did. I think Meg and Bonnie were so excited to see me for a pat one of them must have dropped it.
Mo1959
Legendary Member
- Location
- Perthshire,Scotland
Sorry it's a bit long. Cut and copied from Faceache. Made me laugh.
RETARDED GRANDPARENTS - (this was actually reported by a teacher)
After Christmas, a teacher asked her young pupils how they spent their holiday away from school.
One child wrote the following:
We always used to spend the holidays with Grandma and Grandpa.
They used to live in a big brick house but Grandpa got retarded and they moved to Batemans Bay where everyone lives in nice little houses, and so they don't have to mow the grass anymore!
They ride around on their bicycles and scooters and wear name tags because they don't know who they are anymore.
They go to a building called a wreck centre, but they must have got it fixed because it is all okay now. They do exercises there, but they don't do them very well.
There is a swimming pool too, but they all jump up and down in it with hats on.
At their gate, there is a doll house with a little old man sitting in it. He watches all day so nobody can escape. Sometimes they sneak out, and go cruising in their golf carts!
Nobody there cooks, they just eat out.
And, they eat the same thing every night --- early birds.
Some of the people can't get out past the man in the doll house. The ones who do get out, bring food back to the wrecked centre for pot luck.
My Grandma says that Grandpa worked all his life to earn his retardment and says I should work hard so I can be retarded someday too.
When I earn my retardment, I want to be the man in the doll house. Then I will let people out, so they can visit their grandchildren.
PRICELESS!
Remember to send this to all your "retarded grandparent" friends and give them a laugh too!!
RETARDED GRANDPARENTS - (this was actually reported by a teacher)
After Christmas, a teacher asked her young pupils how they spent their holiday away from school.
One child wrote the following:
We always used to spend the holidays with Grandma and Grandpa.
They used to live in a big brick house but Grandpa got retarded and they moved to Batemans Bay where everyone lives in nice little houses, and so they don't have to mow the grass anymore!
They ride around on their bicycles and scooters and wear name tags because they don't know who they are anymore.
They go to a building called a wreck centre, but they must have got it fixed because it is all okay now. They do exercises there, but they don't do them very well.
There is a swimming pool too, but they all jump up and down in it with hats on.
At their gate, there is a doll house with a little old man sitting in it. He watches all day so nobody can escape. Sometimes they sneak out, and go cruising in their golf carts!
Nobody there cooks, they just eat out.
And, they eat the same thing every night --- early birds.
Some of the people can't get out past the man in the doll house. The ones who do get out, bring food back to the wrecked centre for pot luck.
My Grandma says that Grandpa worked all his life to earn his retardment and says I should work hard so I can be retarded someday too.
When I earn my retardment, I want to be the man in the doll house. Then I will let people out, so they can visit their grandchildren.
PRICELESS!
Remember to send this to all your "retarded grandparent" friends and give them a laugh too!!
Chief Broom
Veteran
Morning folks 
So the process of moving begins....what a faff! I got a call in early today to the council to make sure they know ive accepted their offer. Soon i'll be hiring a van or white van man to shift my worldly poss....crap They say moving is stressful but ive done it umpteen times and certainly doesnt compare to waiting for my roof to blow away! 
So the process of moving begins....what a faff! I got a call in early today to the council to make sure they know ive accepted their offer. Soon i'll be hiring a van or white van man to shift my worldly poss....crap They say moving is stressful but ive done it umpteen times and certainly doesnt compare to waiting for my roof to blow away!
Mo1959
Legendary Member
- Location
- Perthshire,Scotland
Maybe more stressful for those with big houses and loads of stuff that are buying and selling. Not sure I ever fancy it again to be honest so I'll just have to put up with my noisy neighbours!Morning folks
If there's nothing too awkward or heavy you may well manage it yourself with a hire van?
Chief Broom
Veteran
Thats true Mo, my move is more like moving base camp
I will use a van, could almost getaway with a wheel barrow over the golf course as new place is only about 3/4 of a mile away.**i noticed just down the road from me a static caravan has its roof coming away like a pealed back sardine tin!
GM
Legendary Member
- Location
- North of the river
Morning all... I know a lot of you don't like watching The Apprentice, but I've been watching a couple of episodes of The Apprentice Australia on iplayer. Quite enjoying watching it bringing back memories of a couple of years ago when I did the Bridge Climb there.
We've been having a clearout the last couple of days so it's a trip to the charidy shop later.
A tricky Wordle today I just about made it.
Enjoy your day folks!
We've been having a clearout the last couple of days so it's a trip to the charidy shop later.
A tricky Wordle today I just about made it.
Enjoy your day folks!
Back home from taking our Granddaughter to school and it feels as though I've had a full day already! First bus at 7:00am then a second bus towards Bournemouth, collect Granddaughter and take her to school on the bus ( only three stops but she likes to ride the bus ) Wait with the rest of the parents / grandparents / guardians at the school gates to be let into the playground and see her into class.
We then popped into "Mad Cucumber" for a breakfast of Pancakes with maple syrup and a mug of coffee before catching another two buses home. It will be "rinse and repeat" tomorrow morning.
We then popped into "Mad Cucumber" for a breakfast of Pancakes with maple syrup and a mug of coffee before catching another two buses home. It will be "rinse and repeat" tomorrow morning.
Mo1959
Legendary Member
- Location
- Perthshire,Scotland
It’s dreich oot there noo 
Do I want to brave another walk or park my bum and stay cosy watching some Olympics.
Do I want to brave another walk or park my bum and stay cosy watching some Olympics.
classic33
Leg End Member
Parents & guardians used to be allowed no closer than the wall/fence surrounding the school. Now they let you see them into their class!!
classic33
Leg End Member
Make some skis and practice on your early morning donders.It’s dreich oot there noo
