The Wet Wipe Club

[Crankarm]

Wet wipes are great for your chain too!

Your tool as well ……………..

 

[slowmotion]

Someone's rights have been clearly violated. Your union will have lawyers who will redress this outrage.

( was that a split infinitive?)

 

[deptfordmarmoset]

I keep a water bottle in the car, Martin. If I see you on the Rochester Way I'll give you a shower as you pass.

 

[martint235]

You could always go sick…….. work related stress due to not having a shower at work in the mornings…….. As a civil servant you get 6 months on full pay then there after half pay doncha which should see you to when your shower is back in operation?

I hadn't thought of that.

However in other news. The shower has been re-instated. Due to the private sector being sh*te and not having a brain cell to rub between them, the lift engineers turned up on Tuesday, cordoned off the lift to the basement, half the car park, the shower and the 4th floor toilets (don't ask). On Thursday they turned up and realised they hadn't even ordered the parts for the larger basement lift yet. So YAY!!! In fact double YAY as the shower was going to be cordoned off for the duration of the works on both lifts, it will now only be out of bounds for half the previously planned time.

I reckon I could get a project manager job in the private sector easy. I think the interview goes "Name?", "Mr Bloggs", "You start on Monday".

 

[GrumpyGregry]

I hadn't thought of that.

However in other news. The shower has been re-instated. Due to the private sector being sh*te and not having a brain cell to rub between them, the lift engineers turned up on Tuesday, cordoned off the lift to the basement, half the car park, the shower and the 4th floor toilets (don't ask). On Thursday they turned up and realised they hadn't even ordered the parts for the larger basement lift yet. So YAY!!! In fact double YAY as the shower was going to be cordoned off for the duration of the works on both lifts, it will now only be out of bounds for half the previously planned time.

I reckon I could get a project manager job in the private sector easy. I think the interview goes "Name?", "Mr Bloggs", "You start on Monday".

What makes you think they ask your name?

 

[Longshot]

I reckon I could get a project manager job in the private sector easy. I think the interview goes "Name?", "Mr Bloggs", "You start on Monday".

Don't do it! You'd get bored of not having to tick boxes all day long.

 

[martint235]

What makes you think they ask your name?

 

[martint235]

Don't do it! You'd get bored of not having to tick boxes all day long.

But I could revolutionise the sector: "Do we have our kit?" Tick. "Are we able to meet the timescale/budgte?" Tick.

See the world would be a better place.

 

[Longshot]

But I could revolutionise the sector: "Do we have our kit?" Tick. "Are we able to meet the timescale/budgte?" Tick.

See the world would be a better place.

Haven't you missed a few?


Have you read 'Guidelines for Kit' 2014 V214.31?
Have you had approval from the Health & Safety (Kit) Sub-Committee?
Have you had approval from the Legal Department (Kit)?
Have all your kit instructions been translated and printed off in 37 languages?
Have all pieces of your kit been passed by the Sustainability Committee?
Have all of your pieces of kit been approved by the "Enivironmental Impact Assessment" Committee?
Have you ensured that every item of desired kit passes the required tests for racism, genderism, religionism, plagiarism?
Has this been approved by the Isms Committee?
Have you completed Forms 115B (1), (2), (3) and (73(b)) for Purchasing Committee approval?
Have you completed a Diversity Impact Form (31(c))?
Has the Diversity Committee approved these documents?
Has all of the above been approved by the Compliance Committee?
Have you complied with the LGFA Guidelines on "Providing Services in the Public Sector" 2014 on minimum timescales required to undertake anything?
Have you ensured that a change in Govt since the start of the process has not rendered all of the above obsolete in which case a whole newly devised but far better process will need to be complied with?

 

[fossyant]

Whilst you may be joining the 'club' I hope to be leaving it in July when we get new offices. We will have 'showers' whooooo

 

[martint235]

Haven't you missed a few?


Have you read 'Guidelines for Kit' 2014 V214.31?
Have you had approval from the Health & Safety (Kit) Sub-Committee?
Have you had approval from the Legal Department (Kit)?
Have all your kit instructions been translated and printed off in 37 languages?
Have all pieces of your kit been passed by the Sustainability Committee?
Have all of your pieces of kit been approved by the "Enivironmental Impact Assessment" Committee?
Have you ensured that every item of desired kit passes the required tests for racism, genderism, religionism, plagiarism?
Has this been approved by the Isms Committee?
Have you completed Forms 115B (1), (2), (3) and (73(b)) for Purchasing Committee approval?
Have you completed a Diversity Impact Form (31(c))?
Has the Diversity Committee approved these documents?
Has all of the above been approved by the Compliance Committee?
Have you complied with the LGFA Guidelines on "Providing Services in the Public Sector" 2014 on minimum timescales required to undertake anything?
Have you ensured that a change in Govt since the start of the process has not rendered all of the above obsolete in which case a whole newly devised but far better process will need to be complied with?

Yeah but to be fair, and I know it's asking a lot of private sector idiots who seem to be able to screw up whenever they like but keep their jobs, I'd count "Have we got the right kit?" to be near the top of the list.

 

[Sara_H]

Courtesy of the Home Office's ability for crap planning, I will be joining the wet wipe club from tomorrow. We're having the lifts serviced in our building until the end of Sept and naturally the best place for the engineers to store their kit is the one and only shower room. Over summer. Oh joy. There is contigency, I could walk 200 yards to a shower room in a different building but that's not going to happen.

Well I've warned my boss so if I get smelly who cares.

You can join our wet drips club. Our employer has removed some great cycle starage facilities to install a pirpose built facility. Despite a glorious perspex dome, it rains inside as much as out.
Oh, and myself and several others have been locked inside (20 minutes in my case) - but apparently its all user error and tickety boo.