Thinking up jokes

[Yellow Fang]

Why did the Cockney chicken cross the road?
It wanted to get to Peckham.

Is that good enough? How about

Why did the elephant cross the road?
It was a trunk road.

 

[thegravestoneman]

Why did the taxi cross the road?​

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to side swipe the cyclist.​

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apologies to all taxi drivers out there for perpetuating a stereotype​

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​

 

[Cycling Dan]

I always have sex with the front door open,

So I can give Jehovas something to witness.

 

[Over The Hill]

Rather than trot out a bad joke I will address the OP!!
A joke leads the audience along a path and then shows then that they are on the wrong path or shifts their assumption somehow. It is funny because of the process of re-establishing the situation.

So battery has two meanings, free range can be twisted into range rover, the returning husband one has an unexpected end etc.

My favourite chicken joke-
Why did the chicken cross the mobius strip?

to get to the same side.

To make a joke you just find a thing with two meanings and link them oddly or lead the audience to one that then turnd out to be the other.

Two Monkeys in the bath - one went oooh ooh aaah aah
the other said "put some more cold in then".

 

[Radchenister]

It was a good thread until someone took it literally.

Did you hear about the explosion at a cheese factory in France?

There was nothing left but debrie!

 

[deptfordmarmoset]

It was a good thread until someone took it literally.

Did you hear about the explosion at a cheese factory in France?

There was nothing left but debrie!

Which of course left them Leicester export.

 

[ayceejay]

This advice from a local wag regarding bears

When walking in the woods people should wear noisy little bells on their clothing so as not to startle bears that aren't expecting them. You should also carry pepper spray in case of an encounter with a bear. It is also a good idea to watch out for fresh signs of bear activity.You can easily recognize the difference between black bear and grizzly bear poop. Black bear poop contains lots of berries and squirrel fur. Grizzly bear poop has little bells in it and smells like pepper.

 

[02GF74]

What's the difference between a sea turtle and Michael Parkinson?











No idea, if I knew, I wouldn't be asking.

 

[Yellow Fang]

Rather than trot out a bad joke I will address the OP!!
A joke leads the audience along a path and then shows then that they are on the wrong path or shifts their assumption somehow. It is funny because of the process of re-establishing the situation.

So battery has two meanings, free range can be twisted into range rover, the returning husband one has an unexpected end etc.

My favourite chicken joke-
Why did the chicken cross the mobius strip?

to get to the same side.

To make a joke you just find a thing with two meanings and link them oddly or lead the audience to one that then turnd out to be the other.

Two Monkeys in the bath - one went oooh ooh aaah aah
the other said "put some more cold in then".

You mean, as Schopenhauer defined, the sudden incongruity between concept and percept?

 

[twentysix by twentyfive]

One sits in the corner glowering at you, and the other has eight legs.


My coat is the blue one.

Aw Speicher - what HAVE you done this time?

 

[mattobrien]

Two wizards walked down the high street. One turned into a shop.

 

[mattobrien]

There were two fish in a tank, one turns to the other and says how do you drive this thing?

 

[Fnaar]

Two lions walking down Oxford Street* on a Saturday afternon.
One turns to the other and says "Not many people around, are there?"

*(in London, normally a busy shopping thoroughfare)

 

[Andrew_Culture]

How do people think up jokes? I think I would like to be a joke writer, but I have been sitting here fifteen minutes and can't think of anything.

Now let me see,

Why did the goose, turkey, aardvark, lemming cross the road?

Maybe it's easier to think of the punchline first and then work backwards.

Are you sure you want to know? Because you can teach yourself to write comedy quite easily. Most jokes fall into one of a narrow band of categories; absurd, simile and pun.

If you're serious then ready THIS book. I should warn you though, once you understand the mechanics of humour it can kinda ruin your enjoyment of other people's jokes!

 

[ASC1951]

I was thinking of Oscar Pistorius last night.
I wouldn't like to be in his shoes.

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