What is the issue (paranoia?) with giving a phone number to someone?

Discussion in 'CycleChat Cafe' started by night cycler, 14 May 2019.

  1. I don’t know if this is just me or a sign of the times, or maybe both?

    I put an item on freecycle. For the unfamiliar, this is a site where you basically pass on for free your unwanted items to people who can make use of them. I have no issues with the initial/ general communications being via email.

    I was contacted and exchanged emails. “Can you provide address, I can get between 3 to 4pm. If I am delayed I will email you".

    My thinking aloud: Really? What is wrong with a quick call or text, or even a missed call. if you are are late for a 1 hr window?

    I don’t expect you to stick to a specific time-I’m not driving a train. I am happy to ensure I stay at home for one hour so that I am here just for you. If you are so unorganised & chaotic that you cannot keep a flexible 1hr window appointment, you don’t even have to phone or text me. Just send an email. I will keep my data or WiFi running on the phone. I’ll ensure I have the reading glasses close by, and will check emails constantly.

    Night cycler AKA Mr grumpy ?? :cursing::laugh::laugh:
  2. classic33

    classic33 Legendary Member

    E-mailing from work?

    Text is second choice after phonecall, for myself.
  3. OP
    night cycler

    night cycler Veteran

    Don`t know where they were intending emailing from to be sure Classic. I`m guessing it would probably be en route to me and sent via the phone, unless they were expecting to be held up at work and using the office PC

    I just think that generally amongst people there is a great reluctance to allow anyone outside of familiy and close friends to know their phone number. Then they go on Woeful media and tell the world their most intimate stuff.:rolleyes:
    SpokeyDokey and classic33 like this.
  4. alicat

    alicat Guru

    Bit of a sign of the times. Most people have email on their phones and they use the ease of communication to be less reliable than in quill pen days.

    Just email back firmly but politely and say you are going out shortly after 4pm so you trust they can arrive well before then or else call or text on the day and rearrange.
    classic33 and Pat "5mph" like this.
  5. A lot of introverts really don't like telephoning people. I think some peoiple with Autism find it difficult too, don't quote me on that one.
    Fnaar, lane, Pat "5mph" and 4 others like this.
  6. yello

    yello Legendary Member

    Might I ask if you're 'of an age' @night cycler ?

    Because, from my experience, I'd say that times have changed and the norms of communication with them. That said, I don't quite get the preference for mail over text but then maybe they're 'of an age' too and don't have a mobile phone at all! (As classic33 suggested, praps email is their only means of communication) I dunno, but I wouldn't read anything into it. People do stuff differently.

    Sounds like you've used freecycle before. I did, 10 plus years ago now, to down size; stuff still perfectly usable that I didn't feel like selling, nothing of stupendous value. Some of the interested parties were only interested so they could resell on ebay or gumtree (other sites are available) Whatever, I thought, but my preference was for people that genuinely wanted/had a need for the article. My favourite one involved me somehow getting our dishwasher into the back of small - think Panda, Clio (other small cars are available) !
  7. Phaeton

    Phaeton Guru

    Oop North (ish)
    I hate using phones & I work in the Telecom's industry
  8. yello

    yello Legendary Member

    Ah, I get you now. Yes, as if a phone number is somehow a disclosure of privacy too far. I guess maybe it's the one thing that social media isn't and doesn't have - and that's a (perhaps false) notion of anonymity. You can hide behind a user name but a phone number gives you direct access.
  9. Brains

    Brains Guru

    It depends on the person.

    A friend of mine opens his texts maybe once or twice a week.
    He then complains that he did not know something because he was only told by text.
    He also only has a work e-mail address. Therefore is only contactable by e-mail Monday to Friday during working hours
    He does not have WhatsApp or FB, therefore is left out of all discussions and banter.
    (What Age, 70's ? 80's ?, nope 40's !)

    A senior colleague at work was found to have 3,000 unread e-mails in his personal company e-mail folder.
    His attitude was if someone wanted something they would call him.
    lane, Pat "5mph", MarkF and 3 others like this.
  10. marinyork

    marinyork Resting in suspended Animation

    A lot of people with anxiety don't like making telephone calls, however receiving telephone calls unexpectedly or where they don't feel prepared to answer are often regarded as much worse, so do not like giving out numbers.

    Someone with anxiety would have thoughts that someone else would label as sounding quite paranoid.

    Could be plenty of other reasons, maybe they don't have a smartphone or data.
    Fnaar, theclaud, Pat "5mph" and 4 others like this.
  11. ianrauk

    ianrauk Tattooed Beat Messiah

    Atop a Ti
    This is not unusual.
    We also have a colleague who does the same.
    marinyork and Andy in Germany like this.
  12. PeteXXX

    PeteXXX Cake or ice cream? The choice is endless ...

    On Freecycle, the main communication is via the website, surely?
    It's a while since I used it, but I'm sure I didn't know the people's personal details.
    the_mikey likes this.
  13. snorri

    snorri Legendary Member

    Which is an indication of how much time is wasted in sending trivial emails into cyberspace:rolleyes:.
    lane, tyred and Andy in Germany like this.
  14. Brains

    Brains Guru

    Unfortunately people need to move with the times;

    100 years ago, when the main method of communication was the letter or the newspaper, then the ability to read was required. You also also needed an address that the postman could find. I'm sure there were many people who never learnt to read and did not have a a recognisable address.

    With the invention of the Radio and later the TV there would have been many that resisted getting one or the other

    There are quite a few on this forum who will be old enough to remember the machinations one had to go through to get a private phone line in your house and also having to make calls via the operator to far flung places in the country (such as Cornwall) (and I'm talking as recently as the 1980's !)

    Now that mobile phones and PC's are ubiquitous, you can not now rent even out a caravan without wifi any more than you can rent one without electricity, (at least not without mentioning it as a "feature" beforehand)

    Those that don't keep up will be left behind
    Fnaar likes this.
  15. Brains

    Brains Guru

    For example many jobs now insist on web entry of CV's
    Many companies only sell their products via web portals
    Many government forms can only be completed on line

    It is only a matter of time before it will be impossible to go into a bank, or apply for a passport or apply for benefits without the ability to use a website properly.

    There is going to be a large segment of the UK population left behind in the wake
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