Worst song lyric...ever?

[edindave]

This recent one gets my goat on the radio in the car. I really should listen to Radio 2 instead.

If this is a dream, won't open my eyes,
Am I asleep? No, I'm alive

Jessie J, clearly not understanding the difference between being asleep and being dead.

 

[slowmotion]

Actually Bono, we do have a choice and we've been using the off switch for decades

The old ones are the best....

Bono- “Everytime I click my fingers, a child in Africa dies!”
Audience member- “Well stop clicking your farkin fingers then!”

 

[J.Primus]

'And I met a girl
she asked me my name
I told her what it was'

'Somebody Else' by Razorlight.
Also for consideration. Anything else ever written by Razorlight.

 

[StuAff]

View: http://youtu.be/RG0QKaaLTCE

No, no, no......that's a masterpiece.

 

[roadrash]

spitting image ... chicken song . ......... END OF

 

[Speicher]

Tonight I sellotape my glove to you.....

 

[XRHYSX]

Good morning!
Yeaaaaaah!
One, two... one, two, three, four!
Pump it up!
Aaaah! I ramp, me no ramp
Me no skin
Me no play, yeah
When me chant 'pon the microphone
And me say with the DJ
Junglists in the place
Junglists on the case
Scooter, are you readyyy?

 

[XRHYSX]

I have a blue house with a blue window.
Blue is the colour of all that I wear.
Blue are the streets and all the trees are too.
I have a girlfriend and she is so blue.
Blue are the people here that walk around,
Blue like my corvette, it's standing outside.
Blue are the words I say and what I think.
Blue are the feelings that live inside me.
I'm blue da ba dee da ba die...

This is from Eiffel 65, no points for guessing the song title

Love that song, my first car was a blue MK1 Golf when that song was released and played it all the time

 

[User169]

[QUOTE 2685697, member: 1314"]"And he tells her little lies,
And like onions they make her cry."

It's so deliberately and unassumingly trite it's affecting. I like them.[/quote]

Sounds a bit like one of Gedge's, although he put it rather differently:

"At home, she tells him little lies
Like onions always make her cry"

 

[Boris Bajic]

Oh say, can you see,
By the dawn's early light
What so proudly we hailed... etc...

Bunch of separatist, terrorist upstarts and ingrates. Rotten songs, rotten motor industry, rotten film industry, pah!!

 

[The Central Scrutinizer]

I'm getting weighed down with all this information
Safe sex doesn't mean no sex it just means use your imagination
Stop playing with yourselves in hard currency hotels
I look like Robert De Niro, I drive a Mitsubishi Zero

Sexuality- From the bard of barking,billy brag

It's the last line that gets me,it seemed like he was having trouble thinking of something to rhyme with robert de niro so he thinks oh that rhymes mitsurbushi zero.

 

[swee'pea99]

There are some good contributions on this thread, but I can't see anything that threatens"I don't want to see a ghost, It's the sight that I fear most, I'd rather have a piece of toast" for the title of crappest ever. Come on people, dig deep, let's go for the real smelly stuff...

 

[User169]

[QUOTE 2685873, member: 1314"]Yeah, it is. I quoted from an inaccurate memory. Your correction actually makes it rather more sophisticated in that home-spun kitchen sink way. I like it even more.

OT: I've got tickets to see them at Shepherds Bush in November.[/quote]

Cool! I had tickets to see them in Utrecht, but couldn't make it in the end. They're playing in Lille w/end after next, so might see if I can get over there.

 

[hopless500]

Hot dog, jumping frog, Albuquerque.....

 

[swee'pea99]

Hot dog, jumping frog, Albuquerque.....

But...but..that's not crap - that's great! It's got Albuquerque in it - what's not to like?

I really like 'My computer thinks I'm gay' from up-thread, too. There's wit and imagination in there. This is not what we're after: to whit, witlessness and an utter lack of imagination. Hot dog, jumping frog...got maself a steamin' hog - ye-haw!