Written a complaint letter

[zacklaws]

I have always loved to wind people up, and one of the gags I pulled in my Army days concerned a letter of complaint.

One day whilst sat at the platoon commanders desk, I found a bag of crisps in one of the drawers so I scoffed them. Just for a wind up I filled the bag with those polystyrene chips which look like crisps and used for packaging, sealed the packet and put them back in the drawer.

A few days later, the platoon commander having a sense of humour had pinned the packet of crisps on the notice board along with a snotty letter to the maker of the crisps virtually telling them how crap their crisps are and almost gave him terminal constipation.

Not to be outdone, I took the letter, bought a packet of real crisps, of which I ate most of the bag and bundled them together and sent them off to the manufacturer. Low and behold, a few days later, the platoon commander was amazed to receive a package containing a few packets of crisps and a letter of apology.

Bit of a result really as he shared them with us.

 

[Globalti]

I'm a serial complainer and I enjoy a good battle with a manufacturer or retailer. My first ever success was when I bought a piggy pie in Capel Curig that turned out to be mouldy so I sent the wrapper to Walls who sent me a cheque for £0.35 and a letter apologising for my unsatisfactory purchase in "Capel Cung".

Since then I have enjoyed some really rewarding arguments, never bogus or dishonest, just determined to get the matter resolved to my satisfation. I have written letters for colleagues who I thought were getting the brush-off and got satisfation for them. I have found that the way to do it is always to offer the other party a solution that's not entirely one-way as they hate to lose face. My most recent success was when an controller for a heated towel rail broke because heat had driven the plasticiser out of the plastic and made it brittle. The retailer simply came back with the stock response that it was only guaranteed for one year and I could buy a new one for £75, so I took it up with the importer, writing a letter explaining that the wrong plastic had been used, not fit for purpose etc etc and... three days later a brand new controller appeared in the post.

Bring 'em on!

 

[scots_lass]

Well, the deed is done and the letter in the post. As it is to a private company, I don't know if they will take it more seriously than a bigger firm. Read it again this morning before I posted it just in case I came across as a ranting old woman but I think it showed remarkable restraint! Watch this space.