Any good jokes ... ?

[Regular.Cyclist]

Drove up the M6 a few years ago in bright sunshine, the first matrix sign after Gretna was showing, Slow - Heavy Rain, Poor visibility.

I said it's probably broken and that is the default setting.

We park a rather large, dark and rain laden cloud over the border region to try and deter those from the south from coming up north.

 

[Domus]

Rain or midges? Decisions decisions

 

[Regular.Cyclist]

Rain or midges? Decisions decisions

That’s just the west coast. Very little in the way of midges here, and a lot drier than the parts of England that I have lived in.

Anyway, back to the jokes.

 

[Regular.Cyclist]

Today on a drive, I decided to go visit my childhood home. I asked the people living there if I could come inside because I was feeling nostalgic, but they refused and slammed the door in my face.

My parents are the worst!

 

[AndyRM]

 

[tyred]

 

[Dave7]

My life has improved a lot since I started to follow the teachings of that ancient Chinese philosopher Fuk Yu.

 

[Dave7]

2 old ladies talking and one says "I have something between my boobs that never used to be there"
Her friend says "oh dear, what's that"
She says "it's my belly button".

 

[tyred]

 

[Cavalol]

 

[MichaelW2]

What do you call an elephant that doesn't matter?





Irrelephant.

 

[tyred]

It's been statistically proven that those that collect vintage bicycles own more bicycles than those who don't.

 

[srj10]

Apparently it's a cubicle where you can do your business.

 

[T4tomo]

View attachment 729415
Apparently it's a cubicle where you can do your business.

looks like it might splash your shoes?

 

[Cavalol]

My mate accused me of not being a true cockney, so I pushed him down the apples and oranges.