Anyone understand orchestral music why do they need a conductor

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Profpointy

Legendary Member
All together now:

Granny keeps a coffee shop, coffee shop, coffee shop, Granny keeps a coffee shop on the Bristol Road.
(Accelerando) Granny keeps a coffee shop, coffee shop ...

I have no idea what that is doing in my head or how it got there.

Brilliant ! Not heard that one before. On my record of it, though not the one I played in a gig, there is a singing bit, though presumably it's "on the Oslo road" in the Norwegian veraion
 

Profpointy

Legendary Member
I'm reminded of the story of an important concert where due to some last minute problem the conductor can't make it. The impresario is panicking as the audience are in their seats as is the rest of the orchestra, but one of the back desk second violinists rushes into the building, hoping to sneak on stage, but he bumps into the impresario, and apologises profusely. Instead of getting a rocket for being late the impresario says "never mind all that. We need you to go on stage and conduct the band". "I can't do that, I'm not a conductor", protests the fiddle player. "Look, you're dressed up in tails and you already know how the music goes, so just beat time to get them started. You'll be fine, just get on stage and do it". Sure enough he does, and the concert is a huge success and the evening is saved. Next night, at their next gig, with the actual conductor on the podium and the fiddle player back in his place near the back, his colleague beside him asks "where the hell were you last night?"
 
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Profpointy

Legendary Member
All together now:

Granny keeps a coffee shop, coffee shop, coffee shop, Granny keeps a coffee shop on the Bristol Road.
(Accelerando) Granny keeps a coffee shop, coffee shop ...

I have no idea what that is doing in my head or how it got there.

In a similar vein there's the rarely played choral version of Beethoven's 6th "pastoral" symphony

"The country, the country,
the country gets me down.
I hate the country,
I'd rather live in tow-n"
 

bitsandbobs

Über Member
Some years back, City of Birmingham Symphony Orchestra performed Ives' 4th Symphony with Simon Rattle conducting. It is a piece of music so complicated that sections of it need sub-conductors so, at times, there were three conductors simultaneously controlling different sections of the orchestra. It was quite remarkable.

Im going to have to look that one up!!

I was lucky enough once to play in a performance of Berlioz Grande Messe Des Morts in Winchester Cathedral. Its scored for a gigantic orchestra - 16 timpani!! - alongside 4 offstage brass ensembles. They were each located in a different part of the cathedral and each had their own conductor with a sightline to the main conductor (Martin "dreary" Neary?)
 
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DaveReading

Don't suffer fools gladly (must try harder!)
Location
Reading, obvs
Guess with them not needed on buses any more, they gotta do something to earn a crust.

594050
 
Maybe some of our younger viewers were puzzled, but that should go a long way to clarify things. I vaguely remember the old trolley buses back in Reading, and used to think being a conductor was a really cool job, what with that clever ticket machine and a pouch full of money strapped around you. Best bit was at certain sharp corners the pole type thing on top would drop down, loosing electric contact, and the conductor had to quickly re-attach it again - happy days.
 

Accy cyclist

Legendary Member
Just listening to someone on the radio who teaches the violin. She played a few seconds of my hated Vivaldi's Four Seasons. She was ok,but not 'wow!'. Football coaches can teach footballers how to improve their game even though they couldn't do the task themselves. Why/how can someone who can play a certain instrument and teach people how play that instrument not play it so well themselves?🤔
 
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Hacienda71

Mancunian in self imposed exile in leafy Cheshire
I used to play in an orchestra up until my late teens to a pretty high standard. We benefited from having musicians from the BBC Philharmonic teaching us and conducting the orchestra. The conductor plays various roles and is fundamentally important to how the orchestra plays. Their actions as well maintaining timing and giving cues (which can be pretty helpful as a confirmation if you are sitting in the second violins and have had 38 bars off while playing a particularly boring piece of modern classical) they interpret the music and encourage the musicians to play louder, softer with more expression etc. whilst maintaining the timing. Some one in the brass section isn't going to be able to hear if they are drowning out the violas but the conductor in a central position does and controls that. They pick up every nuance of the piece and relay that to the orchestra through expression and action.
As other people have said a lot of work is done before the performance. We used to play section by section or sometimes even desk by desk so the conductor could drill down on what he was hearing and tell us what he wanted to hear.
All that said you do get some conductors who are totally over the top and look like they are going through birth and death during the performance. At a high professional level an orchestra I am sure could play without, but it's ability would be compromised.
 

All uphill

Still rolling along
Location
Somerset
I was just reading another thread here about the Joy's or otherwise of leading cycling groups.

Lots of stuff about riding off the front, indecision, sudden left turn.

Trying to get a group of humans to do anything cooperatively is like herding butterflies.

Good conductors have my deepest admiration.
 
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