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Aren't I the proud parent.

Discussion in 'CycleChat Cafe' started by MichaelM, 20 Sep 2007.

  1. MichaelM

    MichaelM Veteran

    While BFB's kid is off to sing at the Royal Albert Hall, and others proudly anounce their kids GCSE results etc etc...

    I've just had 4 cops at teh door to take my son away for questioning. I just happened to be on the phone to the local nick to see whether or not I could go to bed and the bell rang....

    " He's upstairs" I said, and sent them to his bedroom. Have to admit I was disapointed that they were so polite and called him mate.

    Earlyer, I'd had a guy at the door complaining he'd damaged his car. I told him to report my son to the Police.

    My son has not been involved (caught?) with any criminal activity, but his behaviour leaves something to be desired.

    We withdrew him from school this time last year (in reality, he would have been kicked out anyway) due to his behaviour.

    Blame the parents all you want - I honestly feel I've done my best for him. He had the chance of a good education and turned his nose up at it as being talked at by old ppl in class is boring.

    Uneducated, unemployed, unemployable.

    I want to kick him out, this will move the wife closer to my train of thought (when she fids out, she's on holiday with her sister - should I phone and tell her?).

    He turned 17 in April.

    As an ex-squaddie, I sometimes think a good kicking would do him the world of good.

    Now this would probably have been better off in soapbox.... and if I've mis-spelt anything... don't even start.

    I swear, I'm at my wits end with him....
  2. Bigtallfatbloke

    Bigtallfatbloke New Member

    ..what does he like doing? What is he good at?
  3. Elmer Fudd

    Elmer Fudd Miserable Old Bar Steward

    Dunno what to say Michael, so I won't, but I know the feeling of despair
  4. MichaelM

    MichaelM Veteran

    Likes sleeping and playing the playstation (before I cut the plug off - about 2 months back and have rfused to re-fit it since). Hanging about doing nothing with like-mided ****wit mates.

    Good at:

    Mountain biking - amazing skill on North Shore type stuff
    Tae Kwon Do - 2nd red at the age of 10.
    Maths and Physics - untill his best mate who was top of the class changed schools. He then went from 2nd (competing with mate) to bottom.

    He's also very good at winding me up.

    These days he just sleeps, winds me up, and hangs about with mates. I can't live his life for him. Other than that I'm at Uni trying to study Physics.
  5. MichaelM

    MichaelM Veteran

    What to do?

    My wife is hloiday with her sister in Crete.

    Do I phone and tell her tomorrow - and spoil her holiday. Or do I keep quiet untill she comes back - and get told off for not telling her?

    Any mothers reading this????
  6. Bigtallfatbloke

    Bigtallfatbloke New Member

    ...I can't tell from your post how serious this thing with the police was...but maybe a serious talking to by them might be in order....dunno...here are my thoughts ...

    ...is he bored?


    Maybe he could ride for this lot and burn off some of that energy and have fun and maybe earn a little bit?

    I was watching a tv show tonight about cadets in the marines...all aroung his age (ish)...??

    Sounds like he is rebelling against anything he doesnt like....find something positive he likes and let him loose.

    But what do i know...just a stranger on the internet....I wish all luck anyway.:blush:

    P.s. for my money I'd let your wife have a nice holiday without worrying her...deal with it best you can and sort it all out together when she gets home. I'm sure she deserves a nice holiday without any worry.
  7. Noodley

    Noodley Guest

    I wouldnae bother your wife, let her enjoy the holiday.

    He hasnae killed anybody. But it sounds like he's about to find out that life ain't for pissing about with.
  8. Abitrary

    Abitrary New Member

    I don't think that would solve anything. It will just make him even more angry at the world. And possibly one day at you as well.

    What I'd do is use mental tricks to make him strike the first blow, and then you can give him a good kicking back with good justification.

    I'd practice speaking whilst fighting in the meantime, not just pulling a mean face, so when this day comes you can explain what's happening while you fight.
  9. MichaelM

    MichaelM Veteran

    I don't think that would solve anything.

    I know you're correct. But right now I can't think of anything more positive.
  10. Bigtallfatbloke

    Bigtallfatbloke New Member

    Violence is the last resort of the exhausted intellect...communication breakdown...so talking in a fight as per the last comment is a pretty good idea. Hopefully you won't let it come to that though.
  11. MichaelM

    MichaelM Veteran

    Violence is the last resort of the exhausted intellect...

    You have a point.

    Intellctually ... I'm exhausted.
  12. Bigtallfatbloke

    Bigtallfatbloke New Member

    ...take a deep breath...get some space away from each other for a few hours/ days....a punch up isnt going to solve anything...

    ...you are/were a soldier right?....I'm pretty sure soldiers are trained and are good at remaining calm in a shoot situation...apply that now....take some time...and move on once you and the Mrs have decided what is best when she gets home....
  13. MichaelM

    MichaelM Veteran

    I'm not going to burden you with this anymore tonight.

    He's still at the Police station. I'm going to try and get some sleep.

    Mrs.M will have a nice holiday - untill she comes home. And in my sleep I'm going to have sweet dreams about Quantum Mechanics.

    Night all.
  14. Bigtallfatbloke

    Bigtallfatbloke New Member

  15. Dave Davenport

    Dave Davenport Guru

    We've had very similar experience with our 18 year old, it's not very nice being in youth court thinking how the hell did we end up here when we he's had a stable, loving home and a 'good' upbringing etc. Things are gradually improving, he's now in the TA but I think joining the regulars is the only thing that is likely to sort him out. I used to beat myself up about having failed as a father sort of thing but I think sometimes there's nothing you could do. I get a bit annoyed when people are a bit holier than though and do the blame the parents bit, yes some parents don't give a toss about their kids but we do. Our eldest is an absolute gem, A levels, work ethic etc. so we must have got something right somewhere. I expect there are a lot more parents about with similar problems but when everyone else seems to be discussing what uni their brilliant offspring are going to choose you tend to keep your mouth shut.