asking someone out - question

[Noodley]

If you are as needy as to ask a bunch of strangers on an internet forum, whoever it is you want to ask out will be better off if you didn't.

 

[Drago]

James Hunt never used to mess about. He'd just wander up to a lady and ask up front if they fancied a bunk up. He reckoned 1 in 3 said yes.

 

[DCLane]

He he, I suspect we all would!

I wouldn't!

I wouldn't either

 

[Fnaar]

She rides a bike, and enjoys gardening. I think she enjoys walking/hiking as well.

It's all pointing towards her actually being a lesbian, I reckon...

 

[biggs682]

She rides a bike, and enjoys gardening. I think she enjoys walking/hiking as well.

bet she will still get you to do the gardening and fix any puctures that need doing

go for it and let us know quickly

 

[Linford]

Yes, I was only kidding about the forums, even though if Shaun decides to add a DIY forum to his collection I would be game!
Be aware, about the affairs, that there is a large (do not have statistics) group of women nowadays that are independent financially, maybe a bit disappointed with previous relationships, that still like to have sex (shut your eyes, Nihal!) but do not like the complications of an exclusive relationship.
Again, it's not my cuppa, I see it a lot around me though. And not only in recent years.

I always remember Boy George stating that he preferred a cup of tea to sex. In hindsight, I think he was telling porkies

 

[Linford]

James Hunt never used to mess about. He'd just wander up to a lady and ask up front if they fancied a bunk up. He reckoned 1 in 3 said yes.

It does help if you are an F1 driving playboy with a lot of disposable income

 

[Linford]

Well, here's an idea: on the wave of all things bike now being "in", casually ask if she would come along to a bike shop to help you make up your mind on a new bike/tyres/whatever.
You will have to exchange numbers, so that's a start. After you go for coffee. Depending on how it all developed, a few days later you text her for something trivial, another few days later you propose something else, or maybe by that time she will want to take you to a garden centre
Whatever you do, do not propose a bike ride: unless she is a really good cyclist, and she knows it, she will decline for fear of not being able to keep up.
Good luck!

Sounds like a sensible plan. If the offer of opportunities of shared experiences where you can get to know each other, with easy getout options, she can either warm to it/him or make her feelings known without her feeling under any pressure

Asking someone out is a bit heavy and too formal for most.

 

[TheDoctor]

James Hunt never used to mess about. He'd just wander up to a lady and ask up front if they fancied a bunk up. He reckoned 1 in 3 said yes.

 

[dellzeqq]

[QUOTE 2035253, member: 1314"]Her hair was black and her eyes were green and she had a lingering essence of a west country brogue. She laughed at all my jokes, concurred with my taste in music apart from Macgowan - "he's a bit sombre" - then bought another bottle of red.

At midnight: "I think you're funny, creative and I bet you're good in bed. And you're not a player. You're not a player are you? I've never had a non-white boyfriend before."

It was dark. It was muddy. It was cold. It was wet. She got a cab home - if the dirty was going to happen I was not going to do it in a field of knee high mud. In fact I decided to sleep in the car boot that night it was so minging. We exchanged numbers though. I excused myself exchanging numbers on the grounds that it was drunken flirting, we would be friends but deep down knowing it was not about friendship. I have no exes as friends though so I knew deep down this was all about the lure, the ego and the adventure.

She texted me the next day with a photo of her feet. "Look - I've got trenchfoot from the festival!" She texted me a week after. "Went to the dentist today. He reminded me of you. We only have a couple of asian families in the village."

She texted me just before August: "I've booked the annex at the Hare and Rabbit Inn in the Chiltern Hills for us and have the day free. I had to book 2 nights though otherwise we would have had to check in mid-afternoon and check out mid-morning but now we can have the whole day. I'll be there at 10 in the morning - can you make it?"[/quote]I'm sorry, Crock, but that's a disappointment.

 

[Drago]

And what did you reply to her txt about the hotel?

 

[jefmcg]

Just remembered a news years eve party, where one of the guys had been rejected by X women that year, and decided to get it up to Y by midnight (eg, he'd been turned down by 86 women, and was trying for an annual total of 100 rejections.) So he asked every woman at the party to sleep with him - everyone knew what he was doing. When he got to me, I thought I'd mess with him and said "yes" (I had no intention of following through). Still, I was pretty surprised when he said "you're no fun!" and moved on.

 

[jefmcg]

After all, are men having affairs with themselves? it takes two to tango!

I heard a good explanation about how the statistics of more men cheating come about. Men cheat (excluding Ralph Fiennes) mostly with younger women. Because they are younger, more of them are going to be single. So you can have more mean being unfaithful without anyone telling porkie pies.

And more single younger men and sad older women Hmm, I think I see a solution!

 

[Silver Fox]

He he, I suspect we all would!

I wouldn't.

Having been on the receiving end of infidelity I wouldn't wish that pain on my worst enemy.

Yes, affairs can be exciting for both men and women. But when the novelty wears off and it's realised that the grass isn't greener, the heartache and broken families they leave in their wake is devastating.

 

[Night Train]

He he, I suspect we all would!

I wouldn't.

I've had a few opportunities but never followed up on them.
Not even keen on sex outside of a relationship even when both parties are single. I prefer starting a relationship based on something other then the previous night's sex, especially when alcohol in involved.

I could never understand people starting relationships based on the drunken ramblings and groping in a dark club, where conversation is impossible, and where the memories of the resultant sex is lost in the hangover.


Back to the OP.

Currently I am thinking that it might be best to stop thinking about it. It might have been on your mind too long and the moment to ask has passed.

It would have been better to just ask when you first figured you were interested in her. Now you have thought a lot about it, and have all the forum opinions to consider, it may be less spontaneous when you do ask leading to the self fulfilling prophecy of it being awkward.

But what do I know about people, strange lot they are.