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Friday limerick comp anyone?

Discussion in 'CycleChat Cafe' started by Panter, 28 Sep 2007.

  1. Panter

    Panter Just call me Chris...

    Morning all :biggrin:

    As there seems to be some very talented, humorous posters on here, is anyone up for a cycling limerick competition?

    All in the name of fun obviously and the winner gets, .......well......, to win :biggrin:

    I'll kick off and punt myself into an early lead:



    There was a young man from Kent
    Whose crank was terribly bent
    He reached into his pocket, whipped out a new sprocket
    And with a big grin, off he went.



    Obviously funny ones would be better :biggrin:;)
     
  2. mr_hippo

    mr_hippo Living Legend & Old Fart

    To be pedantic, that is comic verse and not a limerick.
     
  3. Panter

    Panter Just call me Chris...

    Sorry, thats a terrible limerick. You're not gonna win with that.









    :biggrin:


    Ok, anyone up for a comic verse competition?
     
  4. There was a young panter from Sittingbourne,
    whose bib shorts were always getting torn;
    From very first light
    to the darkness of night,
    cycling, just until they were torn.

    :biggrin:
     
  5. Arch

    Arch Married to Night Train

    Location:
    York, UK

    Why?

    Definition:

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Limerick_(poetry)

    Seems to allow a degree of variation, and Panter's seems to fit fine.


    I'm useless at this sort of thing... I'll spend all day working one out now, and it'll be the most tortured limerick you ever heard...
     
  6. mr_hippo

    mr_hippo Living Legend & Old Fart

    A limerick is a five-line poem with a strict form, the metre is wrong and it does not scan.
     
  7. JamesAC

    JamesAC Senior Member

    Location:
    London
    I once wrote a poem for this forum
    I thought on the server I'd store 'em
    But the Admin said "No -
    That's no way to go -
    Instead of amuse, you'd just bore 'em"
     
  8. Frazer

    Frazer New Member

    There once was a racer from Idaho,
    Who always dreamt of turning pro,
    training up every hill,
    with sheer grit and will,
    **** that, ill just take EPO
     
  9. Arch

    Arch Married to Night Train

    Location:
    York, UK
    Ah, the rigid world of hippo once again.

    There was an old man of Bangkuk,
    Who set up a puzzle on duck,
    It went on for ages,
    And swamped many pages,
    Until none of us could give a flip...
     
  10. Tim Bennet.

    Tim Bennet. Entirely Average Member

    Location:
    S of Kendal
    No, that doesn't rhyme either.

    The word you were looking for was '****'.
     
  11. Canrider

    Canrider Guru

    My personal favourite:
    There was a young lass from St. Bees
    Who was stung on the arm by a wasp.
    When asked if it hurt,
    She replied 'Yes it does
    I'm so glad it wasn't a hornet.'

    (In some possible world, it rhymes)

    Oh, poop, it's even on the wiki page.
     
  12. Tim Bennet.

    Tim Bennet. Entirely Average Member

    Location:
    S of Kendal
    There once was a lady from Bude
    Who went for a swim in the lake
    A man in a punt
    Stuck a pole in her ear
    And said you can't swim here it's private.
     
  13. Tetedelacourse

    Tetedelacourse New Member

    Location:
    Rosyth
    A Phd student from York
    Found an archaeological fork
    To the welshman who'd wronged
    Her attack was 3-pronged
    And of similar violence to Bjork
     
  14. Fnaar

    Fnaar Smutmaster General

    Location:
    Thumberland
    There was a young poet called Dan
    Whose poetry just didn't scan.
    When askd why 'twas so
    He said "I don't know...
    But perhaps it has something to do with the fact that I can't resist trying to put as many words into the last line as I possibly...can!

    There was a young man on a trike
    Who fancied a girl on a bike
    But his back wheels got stuck
    Bumping over a rut
    Which was a bit of a shame, really, as he couldn't catch her up and ask her to go to the pictures with him.
     
  15. Elmer Fudd

    Elmer Fudd Miserable Old Bar Steward

    There's a young lady called Nathalus,
    On CycleChat she caused quite a fuss,
    Then she came over here,
    and made it quite clear,
    that really she liked all of us.

    ( Well, most anyway ! )