Funerals... and the scrapping of.

[MontyVeda]

Eh? How so?

I'm talking about people we know have died... you're talking about people who've gone missing.

 

[jefmcg]

When I die I would quite like to have my body stuffed by a taxidermist (after any usable organs have been taken & donated.) then secretly placed somewhere (Like a cave or something.) where it won't be discovered for a long time.

Then when people do eventually discover my body they'll be scratching their heads as to how/why my body ended up there

You know that taxidermy isn't really stuffing, it's attaching the skin only to a form the shape of the original animal. I'm afraid you are going to have to be embalmed if you want to do this prank.

Ugh! Embalming is something I don't understand. Funeral directors talk about the body looking more alive, as if that's a good thing. No way I was going to let that happen.

 

[tyred]

It's all irrelevant to me as I am going to live forever and shall continue in that belief until the day I die.

 

[Berk on a Bike]

Two mourners are talking after a funeral. One says, "that was a lovely service. It's a shame I'll miss my own." The other one adds, "yes, and by only a few days."

Funerals are important. I'd rather have one than not. The buying of one is, however, a surreal experience and one which I'd rather not have to put my loved ones through. Cost isn't the issue, just the minutiae of it all. Best plan in advance then.

 

[Jefferson Meriwether]

You know that taxidermy isn't really stuffing, it's attaching the skin only to a form the shape of the original animal. I'm afraid you are going to have to be embalmed if you want to do this prank.

Embalmings what I meant; got the two muddled up

 

[Piemaster]

When I die I would quite like to have my body stuffed by a taxidermist (after any usable organs have been taken & donated.) then secretly placed somewhere (Like a cave or something.) where it won't be discovered for a long time.

Then when people do eventually discover my body they'll be scratching their heads as to how/why my body ended up there

Think the Pharaohs have already beaten you with that one.

 

[Sandra6]

I don't like funerals at all, and not just because if the obvious sadness.
It's the whole " ceremony" and hypocrisy of it. people who hadn't spoken to you or your family for years turning up to " pay their respects" , raising a glass at the wake when they never had a drink with you when you were alive. False promises of not leaving it so long etc.
And a vicar or humanitarian stand in spouting on about good deeds and cherished memories while you sit there wondering who on earth they're talking about.
If I were to plan my own I'd be quietly shoved into the furnace in an empty crem and I wouldn't feel it necessary to inform anyone who didn't notice I'd gone within the first few days.

 

[snorri]

The Crematorium based funerals are awful and should be abolished.

Indeed, better to dress for the weather at a planting rather than have to take part in the production line process in a crematorium.

 

[ClichéGuevara]

I shied away from attending a funeral yesterday. It wasn't a person close to me so I didn't feel like i had to attend, but am feeling slightly guilty for not attending and supporting the family... but it got me thinking... do we need funerals?

Like weddings and christenings, a funeral is (IMO) a pointless ritual. Personally, I'd rather not have one. If i was leaving a party early i'd just quietly slope off rather than get everyone's attention and announce my departure. Some may argue that the 'send off' is important for grieving friends and family, but is it? Or is it just something that keeps funeral directors in business and allows florists to profit from grief. I say scrap the funeral ritual.

*Is this a suitable cafe topic? ...or more SC&P?

How're the immortality plans going? So far so good for me.

 

[snorri]

A friend recently attended the funeral of a woman who had become separated from her husband although he did play a role in the funeral arrangements.
The tunes played as background music prior to the service were the Ray Charles number "Take these chains from my heart and set me free" followed by Hank Williams "Your cheatin' heart".
Who chose the music? No one had the nerve to ask but I'm sure it will come out eventually.

 

[Littgull]

My wife has always been adamant that when she does she wouldn't want a funeral and even more wouldn't want there to be a wake. Her view is shaped by losing both her parents when they were only in their forties and at the wakes the 'mourners' although all decent folk talked about everything except the person who died. A work colleague of mine recently attended a funeral and wake for a young teenage girl who was the daughter of my colleague's friends. The girl had died from a terminal illness. The funeral and afterwards were managed as a celebration of the girl's short life. Far from grieving and wearing black it was turned in to a rather 'joyous' occasion yet still very dignified and respectful. I can relate to that approach. The parents were not religious but I'm not sure that makes any difference .

 

[vernon]

What the point of carping on about the funeral customs and practices which don't coincide with one's own personal views? It doesn't alter their validity/value to the practitioners but does seem to increase the blood pressure and gastric reflux of the complainants. It's just not healthy.

FWIW I am now approaching the age where a lot folk that are much older than me will be joining the burial queues. I will attend all of the funerals that I'm invited to and embrace all of the rituals that are concomitant with the faiths of the deceased.

 

[Racing roadkill]

The way I look at it ( and always has been) is that I would only attend my own wedding ( not flipping likely ), and that I would probably be late for my own funeral.

 

[colly]

I'm donating what's left of me to medical research.
https://www.hta.gov.uk/faqs/body-donation-faqs

If my body is in the right condition it can be used for teaching, experimentation, research or what ever.
It sounds kind of grisly but I won't be needing it.

 

[slowmotion]

I suspect that as you slide nearer to the date of your own, you get a bit more relaxed about other peoples'. My 92 year old uncle died after Christmas and I went to his funeral at a crematorium. About fifteen people from his family. Widow, daughter , grandchildren and great-grandchildren, and spouses. His son-in-law described his life to the younger generations and I learned a lot about him. We went to a nearby pub and had a five hour meal with some drinks, and talked and laughed. It was a real celebration.
All this talk of being left in a black bin bag on the pavement for the council to cart off with the trash is bonkers.