Hipster advice required

[threebikesmcginty]

Stop, hail a cab and get it to drop you round the corner.

 

[threebikesmcginty]

Pretend to have a heart attack, you'll get taken off in an ambulance, 5 minutes up the road tell them you feel better and could they drop you off at an address to suit - job done and no extra attention bought upon yourself.

 

[Archie_tect]

I think this calls for a 'left gas on at home' moment...

 

[accountantpete]

I recently walked purposely into my local pet shop only to find myself deep inside the card shop next door with the owner looking expectantly at me.

Not wanting to fork out £2 for a card I didn't want I rummaged through some crap and then announced that my Aunt wasn't that ill after all and left.

 

[threebikesmcginty]

How about helmet cams for pedestrians to get some of these wicked crimes, like hurlting and stopping or turning, up on youtube for some serious abuse. Is there a PedestrianChat, they could all start fighting over nothing in the Walking to Work forum?

Look at the excessive wear on those Hush Puppies, no wonder he's all over the pavement.
The dark colours on that business suit, hardly surprising someone bumped into him, that bowler should be hi-viz.

etc...

 

[welsh dragon]

Some years ago I did exactly that .... and with my eyes firmly fixed on her I walked smack into a road sign. It gave me such a fearful crack on the side of the swede that I thought at first some unseen boyfriend had tried to deck me.

Maybe you and the OP should wear a helmet and sun glasses then no one will see your face. then we can have a debate as to wether helmets should be worn at all times.

 

[Fnaar]

[QUOTE 2936578, member: 259"]Pretend that you've been stung on your bum by a wasp and hop around from foot to foot going "ow!" in a loud voice, gradually turning as you do so.[/quote]
That's how Jackson got started with the Moonwalk thing

 

[tyred]

Never turn back. Keep going and find an alternative route. Even if it does add ten miles to your journey at least you won't feel a prat.

 

[Globalti]

Stop and look in a shop window or tie your shoelace then set off in the opposite direction. Any members of MI5 watching you will shudder with fear as they recognise the mark of a true professional.

 

[Archie_tect]

Don't forget to whisper into your lapel as you turn though...

 

[slowmotion]

Walk into a shop and pretend to be browsing. When the staff are not looking, sneak into a storeroom and climb out of a window into the back alley, thereby effecting a stealthy Uey. Hip, or what?

 

[perplexed]

It should be "around" not "round" - I think careless use of language is a much greater threat to "society"!

I'm going to check that out with Kyle when she gets home...

Yep, she says 'I'm..,spinning around, move out of my way...'

 

[GrumpyGregry]

It should be "around" not "round" - I think careless use of language is a much greater threat to "society"!

round
raʊnd/

adverb
Brit.
adverb: round

1. 1.
   so as to rotate or cause rotation; with circular motion.
   "a plane circled round overhead"
   • so as to cover or take in the whole area surrounding a particular centre.
     "she paused to glance round admiringly at the décor"
   • so as to reach everyone in a particular group or area.
     "he passed round a newspaper cutting"
2. 2.
   so as to rotate and face in the opposite direction.
   "he swung round to face her"

The biggest threat to society and western civilisation is.....

 

[Cyclist33]

I knew someone would bite.

 

[GrumpyGregry]

Anyway.

Stop.

Stare into the middle distance as if a genius idea is slowly forming in your mind.

Turn round.

Set off purposely* in another direction.

* key. Absolutely key.