Hold a loaded pistol against their temples. Lock their close family in a dungeon and apply an electric current to their genitals if the employee slows down.
Just what they're doing here then, you can't beat a bit of Christmas cheer What kind of employees doing what kind of work? The way to motivate them will be influenced by their position, roles and responsibilities. (How many points in bullshit bingo for that?).
There's a book called 'Zap' if you are looking to motivate employees but it is quite old (10-15 years) but the principles are good. It's basically about positive empowerment and motivation. If they don't respond they're in the wrong job (put politely). Another called "Don't Fire Them. Fire Them Up." about good management.
Why is it always done before Xmas? Start the New Year fresh? It always struck as a really awful time to do it; prior to a new financial year is understandable but that's normally April.
getting tax year and financial year mixed up there crackle. Wehn I worked for Ministry of Sound they would off load a number of people every year at xmas. I was one of them one year
Nah, last two companies I worked for, the financial year and tax year were the same, which made sense.
The MD of a company I used to work for obviously believed in the motivational power of redundancy. He got rid of 20+ people (more than 10% of the workforce) one morning. To show the rest of us how we might prosper if we worked really hard he had his new Ferrari delivered to the front of the main office block about an hour later while desks were still being cleared. Nice touch...
Wow, that's a clarse act. Another one to add to the what not to do list... Hold a poorly advertised drinks and mince pies Christmas gathering and then when only a few people attend send a bad tempered email to everyone giving them a nice Christmas bollocking. (C) My head of department, today.
Have you considered thinking about what motivation actually is, what it means? Firstly you might ask yourself what motivates you? You can actually take some of the examples above, those people would be motivated by the threat of physical pain, but it could also be any other kind of pain or suffering, e.g. financial, that they would want to avoid. A more positive way of motivating people would be the possibility of some kind of reward, a bonus for instance. Remind you of an old cliché you might have heard of? (clue - it has carrot and stick in it.)
1. Continually change working practices so no-one understands what is expected of them; 2. Threaten redundancies; 3. Hold very regular job evaluations which find the job requires less effort and so reduce take home pay; 4. Foster an atmosphere where all employees are terrified to speak "off message"; 5. Introduce performance related pay as it is always possible to highlight negatives at the expense of positives. This also saves on the pay bill; 6. Ensure management errors are delegated; 7. Ensure solid practical suggestions from the staff originate from the management; 8. Ensure training is minimised so that when staff make errors, they can be blamed; 9. Allow staff absolutely minimum holidays, that way staff skills are maintained; 10. Make them work long, antisocial hours so that home life becomes marginalised. That's the way my place motivates.
