I did it with a chicken!

[661-Pete]

Oh?! Jolly well done Mr Pie, we knew you could do it! (*Must remember, when I get home, to dig up that YouTube list of stage sprint finishes that - er - didn't quite go to plan*)

Actually I used to ride no-hands pretty much all the time, when I was a kid. Street-cred in those days, you must understand. However, seeing as nowadays kids all ride no-arse (or so it seems), the no-hands habit has gone down the tubes.

Next step, young Piemaster: get into unicycling. It's fun if you can manage it!

 

[Aperitif]

A chicken on one side of your bike tends to pullet to one side if riding no-handed.

 

[BigSteev]

I can say from experience that having 32 cans of Stella distributed around the bike in four panniers makes riding with no hands a great deal easier. And having already consumed a good deal of Stella makes falling off a less scary prospect anyway.

Carrying 32 cans of Stella on my bike would by necessity involve riding no-handed. Still, no problem there.

 

[knackeredknees]

I think that if too many cyclists rode no-handed the government my try to bantam.

 

[wafflycat]

A chicken on one side of your bike tends to pullet to one side if riding no-handed.

And if plod sees you, a charge of dangerous cycling and you'll be up before the beak!

Just egging-on the puns... keep them coming.

 

[knackeredknees]

And if plod sees you, a charge of dangerous cycling and you'll be up before the beak!

Just egging-on the puns... keep them coming.

Yes, you could end up with egg on your face.

 

[661-Pete]

Back to no-hands stuff: well the distance you can cycle hands-free, ranges from a few yards to several miles...

 

[knackeredknees]

Back to no-hands stuff: well the distance you can cycle hands-free, ranges from a few yards to several miles...

But if it was a battery chicken you could probably get 20 miles.

 

[Fnaar]

Make sure you don't accidentally take your c0ck out!
(Gets coat, leaves)

 

[longers]

If you had an off while riding no-handed and your bike became entangled in a hedge you'd be best advised to pullet free.

 

[NormanD]

yeah don't fall Fowl of the law or your chicken could be Goosed

I've played Chicken with a dangerous stunt before, but never actually taken one with me to prove it works thought

 

[thomas]

And if plod sees you, a charge of dangerous cycling and you'll be up before the beak!

Nah, the plod wouldn't go that clucking far (too much paper work)....probably just have a good squawk about it instead.

 

[661-Pete]

Careful there! They Ken tuck y'er into custody if you push them too far!


And there's nuggetting outta jail once they lock you up.

 

[longers]

Where did you poach them jokes from Pete?

 

[661-Pete]

I scrambled them up all on my little own....