Pink Colnago = a gay Michael Corleone (a bit poofy yet quite hard)
Old ladies bike = the witch off of the Wizard of Oz (old, smelly but she flies)
Rocky Mountain = a bulimic B A Barracas (skinny yet blingy)
Schwinn Black Phantom = Tony Curtis (as American as apple pie but shinier)
Wincheetah = George Clooney (handsome, intelligent yet laid back)