I'll precis this one so elaborate if you tell it down the boozer.
George W Bush dies and goes to Hell. The devil says,'We're full up but you've been so bad you'll have to come in but replacing a someone. You can choose from 3 which one you swop with for eternity'
First one is Ted Kennedy climbing out of a car and nearly drowning over and over again - Dubya says 'No thanks, I don't fancy that for all eternity'
Second one is Tony Blair breaking rocks in searing heat - Dubya says 'No thanks ....etc.....
Third and last choice is Bill Clinton lying naked on a bed with Monica Lewinski leaning over him giving him a BJ.
George says to the devil,' yeah, that'll do for me'
and the devil says.....
Victoria Beckham and her driver were cruising along a country road one evening when a cow ran in front of the car. The driver tried to avoid it but couldn't - the cow was killed. Posh told her driver to go up to the farmhouse and explain to the owners what happened. About an hour later, the driver staggered back to the car with his clothes in disarray. He was holding a bottle of wine in one hand, a cigar in the other and smiling happily.
"What happened?" asked Posh .
"Well," the driver replied, "the farmer gave me the wine, his wife gave me the cigar, and their beautiful daughter made mad passionate love to me."
"My God, what did you tell them?" asked Posh.
The driver replied: "I'm Victoria Beckham's driver, and I just killed the cow."